1
00:03:42,604 --> 00:03:44,440
[men] Luke!
2
00:03:45,357 --> 00:03:47,234
Luke!
3
00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:48,441
Luke!
4
00:03:48,465 --> 00:03:51,737
- So what actually happened?
- He just fell off a precipice.
5
00:03:51,862 --> 00:03:54,542
One minute we were standing there,
the next he wasn't there anymore.
6
00:03:54,566 --> 00:03:56,409
Yeah, he drank too much
at the wedding.
7
00:03:56,534 --> 00:03:59,371
- [David] Luke!
- [Tom] Luke!
8
00:03:59,496 --> 00:04:00,748
[Graham] Luke!
9
00:04:01,290 --> 00:04:02,834
[David] It was such a big fall.
10
00:04:02,959 --> 00:04:05,159
Do you think there's any chance
he could've survived it?
11
00:04:05,183 --> 00:04:07,715
- Yeah, course.
- [David] Oh, great.
12
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,761
A chance in a million,
it's still a chance.
13
00:04:10,886 --> 00:04:12,846
[man] Hello!
14
00:04:12,971 --> 00:04:14,390
Shh.
15
00:04:14,515 --> 00:04:16,476
[man] Hello!
16
00:04:16,601 --> 00:04:17,769
Hello!
17
00:04:17,894 --> 00:04:19,104
- That's Luke.
- It's Luke.
18
00:04:19,229 --> 00:04:20,814
- Luke!
- Luke!
19
00:04:20,939 --> 00:04:22,484
- Luke!
- Luke!
20
00:04:23,526 --> 00:04:25,780
Oh, my God. You made it!
21
00:04:25,905 --> 00:04:28,699
- How did you even survive that?
- I know.
22
00:04:28,824 --> 00:04:31,787
I fell through the trees up there.
They must have broken my fall.
23
00:04:31,912 --> 00:04:32,996
Are you OK?
24
00:04:33,121 --> 00:04:36,501
Yeah, my arm hurts a bit,
but otherwise, yeah, I'm fine.
25
00:04:36,626 --> 00:04:37,670
[laughs]
26
00:04:38,921 --> 00:04:40,673
I must be the luckiest man alive!
27
00:04:40,798 --> 00:04:43,093
Oh, God!
28
00:04:46,931 --> 00:04:49,559
He's definitely dead now.
29
00:04:49,685 --> 00:04:52,563
[dramatic music]
30
00:05:02,283 --> 00:05:07,122
Perhaps you, er... you guys would like
to spend a few minutes with him?
31
00:05:07,267 --> 00:05:10,187
That'd be good, thanks.
32
00:05:19,699 --> 00:05:21,118
[cat miaowing]
33
00:05:21,243 --> 00:05:23,996
[dogs barking]
34
00:05:30,271 --> 00:05:33,442
- I'll leave you to it.
- Thanks.
35
00:05:41,077 --> 00:05:42,245
[sighs]
36
00:05:42,370 --> 00:05:43,914
Jesus!
37
00:05:44,039 --> 00:05:46,041
I can't believe he's gone.
38
00:05:46,166 --> 00:05:49,754
One second he was there talking to us,
and the next he's...
39
00:05:50,630 --> 00:05:52,258
got a massive boner.
40
00:05:52,383 --> 00:05:54,635
- What?
- Look at that thing.
41
00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:57,514
OK, keep your voice down.
42
00:05:59,225 --> 00:06:01,102
Wow!
43
00:06:01,227 --> 00:06:03,355
Why has he got a boner?
He shouldn't have a boner.
44
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:06,442
Do you think that vet
was touching him up just now?
45
00:06:06,567 --> 00:06:08,194
[dog barks]
46
00:06:08,319 --> 00:06:11,200
You know, I actually think I've heard
of this happening with dead bodies.
47
00:06:11,224 --> 00:06:12,624
They get a rigor mortis erection.
48
00:06:12,794 --> 00:06:14,595
[David] Maybe we should try
and get rid of it.
49
00:06:14,619 --> 00:06:16,955
I don't really want everyone
coming in and seeing that.
50
00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:19,001
Why not? It's not like
he's going to care, is he?
51
00:06:19,025 --> 00:06:20,918
Luke's our friend, Tom.
He's just died.
52
00:06:21,044 --> 00:06:23,297
The least we can do
is afford him a bit of dignity
53
00:06:23,422 --> 00:06:26,801
and not have his erect nob on display
for the whole world to see.
54
00:06:26,926 --> 00:06:29,596
- How are we going to get rid of it?
- I don't know.
55
00:06:29,721 --> 00:06:32,224
Well, maybe one of us
should try pushing it down.
56
00:06:32,349 --> 00:06:34,227
Yeah.
57
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:36,229
I'm not touching it.
58
00:06:36,354 --> 00:06:38,315
What difference does it make?
He's not gonna know.
59
00:06:38,357 --> 00:06:41,737
But I'll know. I have got a very
strict policy about touching penises,
60
00:06:41,862 --> 00:06:43,155
especially erect ones.
61
00:06:43,280 --> 00:06:46,493
- If it's so easy why don't you do it?
- OK, fine.
62
00:06:48,953 --> 00:06:51,082
[dramatic music]
63
00:06:53,919 --> 00:06:56,380
- No, I can't do it.
- Look, just massage around it.
64
00:06:56,505 --> 00:06:58,841
That should re-calibrate the pressure
away from the penis,
65
00:06:58,966 --> 00:07:01,678
- bring it down that way.
- OK, move out of the way.
66
00:07:07,769 --> 00:07:09,313
[dog barks]
67
00:07:11,357 --> 00:07:13,985
That looks bloody weird.
68
00:07:14,111 --> 00:07:16,114
Thanks, Tom, that helps a lot.
69
00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:20,077
Don't actually think it's working.
I think it's getting stiffer.
70
00:07:20,202 --> 00:07:22,121
Shit, you're right.
71
00:07:22,246 --> 00:07:25,333
Graham, grab that book.
Try giving it a whack.
72
00:07:25,458 --> 00:07:27,878
- Really?
- [David] Yeah.
73
00:07:31,466 --> 00:07:34,428
- What, just twat it?
- Yes.
74
00:07:34,553 --> 00:07:36,764
[dramatic music]
75
00:07:38,850 --> 00:07:41,311
Put some backbone into it.
76
00:07:41,437 --> 00:07:43,565
Alright.
77
00:07:43,690 --> 00:07:44,691
[grunts]
78
00:07:54,244 --> 00:07:56,956
Fuck, this is no good.
Let's try holding him upside down.
79
00:07:57,081 --> 00:07:58,882
Maybe the blood will drain
away from his cock.
80
00:07:58,906 --> 00:08:01,074
- Good idea.
- Go.
81
00:08:03,631 --> 00:08:06,051
This isn't working.
Why isn't it working?
82
00:08:06,177 --> 00:08:08,804
I'll try the book.
83
00:08:16,689 --> 00:08:18,358
[clears throat]
84
00:08:23,907 --> 00:08:25,618
He's got a boner.
85
00:08:25,743 --> 00:08:27,995
I mean, it wasn't like
we gave him the erection.
86
00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:31,291
It just sort of sprang up.
We were trying to get rid of it.
87
00:08:31,416 --> 00:08:32,960
Well, I'm afraid that someone
88
00:08:33,085 --> 00:08:35,296
is gonna have to call
the next of kin and let them know.
89
00:08:36,005 --> 00:08:38,550
- About the boner?
- About the death.
90
00:08:38,675 --> 00:08:40,887
Oh! Yes, of course.
91
00:08:41,012 --> 00:08:42,680
Obviously, you're absolutely right.
92
00:08:42,805 --> 00:08:45,226
Sorry, my mind's just, uh...
93
00:08:46,268 --> 00:08:49,272
Tom, would you like to do it?
94
00:08:50,315 --> 00:08:52,485
- No, thanks.
- Why not?
95
00:08:52,610 --> 00:08:54,050
Er... same reason you don't want to.
96
00:08:54,074 --> 00:08:56,240
Because it's a shitty job
and his aunt's stone deaf.
97
00:08:56,365 --> 00:08:58,033
Maybe Henry will answer the phone.
98
00:08:58,158 --> 00:09:00,954
Mad Cousin Henry? That's even worse.
Every time I see that psychopath,
99
00:09:01,079 --> 00:09:02,759
he threatens
to put his prison mates on me.
100
00:09:02,872 --> 00:09:04,708
- He does that to me as well.
- Me too.
101
00:09:04,833 --> 00:09:07,433
[David] OK, well he hates all of us.
So who's gonna make the call?
102
00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:09,919
Well, it should probably be the one
who was closest to Luke.
103
00:09:09,943 --> 00:09:11,514
- Thank you.
- And that was you.
104
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,446
That's not true at all. You and him
were just as close as we were.
105
00:09:14,470 --> 00:09:16,616
- Plus, you had that special connection.
- What special connection?
106
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:18,326
- You totally had a special connection.
- Bollocks.
107
00:09:18,350 --> 00:09:20,111
Anyway, it was Graham
who was always going on
108
00:09:20,135 --> 00:09:22,575
- saying they were best friends.
- When we were younger maybe,
109
00:09:22,648 --> 00:09:24,459
but we drifted apart
over the last couple of years.
110
00:09:24,483 --> 00:09:26,043
- No, you fucking didn't.
- Yes, we did!
111
00:09:26,151 --> 00:09:27,552
- You fucking didn't.
- Yes, we did.
112
00:09:27,597 --> 00:09:28,877
- No, you did not.
- Yes, we did.
113
00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:31,503
I didn't even like him
that much towards the end.
114
00:09:37,082 --> 00:09:38,585
OK, this is getting embarrassing.
115
00:09:38,710 --> 00:09:41,030
We're just gonna have to do
a thumbs up, thumbs down thing.
116
00:09:41,054 --> 00:09:42,506
The odd one out makes the call.
117
00:09:42,631 --> 00:09:44,883
No, I always lose
at thumbs up, thumbs down.
118
00:09:45,009 --> 00:09:47,887
It's a one in three chance, Graham.
Just do it.
119
00:09:48,013 --> 00:09:49,974
Fine.
120
00:09:50,099 --> 00:09:51,934
[all] One, two, three.
121
00:09:52,727 --> 00:09:54,605
One, two, three.
122
00:09:54,730 --> 00:09:58,151
- One, two, three.
- Fuck it!
123
00:10:01,488 --> 00:10:05,452
Massive rock, a massive rock.
124
00:10:05,577 --> 00:10:07,912
No, no, it's Graham.
125
00:10:08,831 --> 00:10:11,459
No, Graham's alive, Luke's dead.
126
00:10:12,794 --> 00:10:14,379
Yes! Ye...
127
00:10:15,297 --> 00:10:17,842
Yes, your nephew is dead.
128
00:10:18,926 --> 00:10:21,055
No, he died.
129
00:10:21,180 --> 00:10:24,142
D-E-A-D, dead.
130
00:10:25,435 --> 00:10:27,562
No, no, don't put Henry
on the phone.
131
00:10:28,481 --> 00:10:32,027
No, no! Don't put Henry
on the phone.
132
00:10:34,112 --> 00:10:35,531
He wants to speak to you.
133
00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:41,455
[bells ringing]
134
00:10:43,375 --> 00:10:48,130
[Henry] David, is it true
what Graham just told me?
135
00:10:49,006 --> 00:10:50,424
Yeah, I'm so sorry.
136
00:10:50,549 --> 00:10:53,053
It's just the worst thing
that could've possibly happened.
137
00:10:53,178 --> 00:10:57,392
- How's your mum?
- Oh, she's in pieces.
138
00:10:58,727 --> 00:11:01,939
Keeps saying she wants to see him.
139
00:11:02,064 --> 00:11:04,275
How soon can you get
the body back to London?
140
00:11:04,401 --> 00:11:06,401
I don't know.
We'll get him back as soon as we can.
141
00:11:06,425 --> 00:11:07,822
Whose fault was this?
142
00:11:08,364 --> 00:11:11,660
What? No, it wasn't anyone's fault.
It was a total accident.
143
00:11:11,785 --> 00:11:14,414
I know what a bunch
of fucking idiots you lot are.
144
00:11:14,539 --> 00:11:16,916
I've always told him
he should cut you all loose.
145
00:11:17,041 --> 00:11:19,545
So, I'm holding you personally
responsible for this, David.
146
00:11:19,670 --> 00:11:20,838
Me, why me?
147
00:11:20,963 --> 00:11:23,508
He was only down there
because of your wedding!
148
00:11:24,634 --> 00:11:26,679
You were the one
that dragged him down there!
149
00:11:26,804 --> 00:11:28,180
You're the one
that got him killed!
150
00:11:28,305 --> 00:11:31,893
And you're the one that's going
to bring him back in one piece!
151
00:11:32,519 --> 00:11:34,647
I will, I'll bring him back
in one piece.
152
00:11:35,231 --> 00:11:36,232
Good.
153
00:11:38,152 --> 00:11:41,406
Cos if you don't,
I'm gonna fuck you, David.
154
00:11:41,531 --> 00:11:44,451
I'm going to fuck you harder
than you've ever been fucked before.
155
00:11:44,576 --> 00:11:45,786
Do you understand me?
156
00:11:47,705 --> 00:11:49,666
Yeah, I understand.
157
00:11:49,791 --> 00:11:51,626
Good.
158
00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:01,639
We need to get Luke back to London
as soon as possible.
159
00:12:02,432 --> 00:12:05,186
- [Graham] How's Mia doing?
- [David] She's been better.
160
00:12:05,311 --> 00:12:08,356
Poor thing. One minute she's
getting ready for her honeymoon,
161
00:12:08,482 --> 00:12:09,816
the next you're off to London.
162
00:12:09,941 --> 00:12:12,445
I know, luckily Mia
is a very understanding person.
163
00:12:12,570 --> 00:12:13,988
Well, she must be,
164
00:12:14,113 --> 00:12:17,284
especially as she got her dad to agree
to us taking his corporate jet.
165
00:12:17,409 --> 00:12:20,497
- How was he about that?
- Not as bad as you'd expect.
166
00:12:20,622 --> 00:12:22,916
- Cool.
- Not great though. Anyway, I had to.
167
00:12:23,042 --> 00:12:25,377
Henry kept going on about
getting Luke back in one piece,
168
00:12:25,503 --> 00:12:27,130
otherwise he says
he's going to fuck me.
169
00:12:27,255 --> 00:12:28,840
What the hell
does he mean by that?
170
00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:31,646
I don't know, but whatever he means,
let's face it, I don't want it.
171
00:12:31,761 --> 00:12:33,881
So I'm gonna really need you guys
to help me make sure
172
00:12:33,905 --> 00:12:35,641
we get Luke back OK and on time.
173
00:12:35,766 --> 00:12:38,101
- No problem.
- Sure.
174
00:12:39,896 --> 00:12:41,689
Mate, it's never going to fit.
175
00:12:46,488 --> 00:12:48,448
[banging continues]
176
00:12:50,618 --> 00:12:52,658
We're gonna have to put it
in the passenger section.
177
00:12:55,499 --> 00:12:58,086
- How're you doing?
- How the hell did this happen, Graham?
178
00:13:00,129 --> 00:13:01,549
Well, a massive rock fell on him.
179
00:13:01,674 --> 00:13:03,133
[sighs]
180
00:13:04,593 --> 00:13:06,596
Which country
are we flying over now?
181
00:13:06,721 --> 00:13:09,475
- Still Australia.
- What, still?
182
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:11,978
We've been flying for hours.
183
00:13:18,319 --> 00:13:21,907
- Are you OK?
- Hmm? Oh yeah, I'm fine, thanks.
184
00:13:23,242 --> 00:13:25,036
Were you thinking
about your friend?
185
00:13:25,620 --> 00:13:27,872
What? Oh, yeah.
186
00:13:33,005 --> 00:13:34,423
Thanks.
187
00:13:35,882 --> 00:13:38,136
Were you close?
188
00:13:38,261 --> 00:13:41,181
Well, I've known him
since I was a kid, so... you know.
189
00:13:42,391 --> 00:13:43,601
So sad.
190
00:13:44,185 --> 00:13:46,813
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
191
00:13:48,983 --> 00:13:53,530
If there's anything else you need,
just let me know.
192
00:13:56,117 --> 00:13:58,077
Yeah, will do.
193
00:14:02,166 --> 00:14:04,044
I saw this on telly.
194
00:14:04,753 --> 00:14:06,630
Got to get it, pump it all out.
195
00:14:07,590 --> 00:14:09,634
I don't want to get
deep vein thrombosis.
196
00:14:09,759 --> 00:14:12,220
- [groaning]
- Hey.
197
00:14:12,346 --> 00:14:13,847
Psst.
198
00:14:17,143 --> 00:14:19,480
I think I might be in there
with that stewardess.
199
00:14:20,189 --> 00:14:21,273
What?
200
00:14:21,398 --> 00:14:25,028
I've got a feeling she could be up
for a sympathy shag.
201
00:14:25,153 --> 00:14:27,114
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.
202
00:14:27,782 --> 00:14:30,077
- Anyway, where would you even do it?
- Toilet.
203
00:14:31,119 --> 00:14:32,913
And you really think
that's appropriate?
204
00:14:33,915 --> 00:14:36,459
I'll be honest, mate,
I'm a bit torn on this one.
205
00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:38,504
But then Luke's death
has reminded me
206
00:14:38,629 --> 00:14:42,217
that we need to make the most
of life's opportunities, you know?
207
00:14:42,342 --> 00:14:44,761
So what do you want from me?
208
00:14:44,886 --> 00:14:46,806
- Approval?
- That would be great, actually.
209
00:14:49,851 --> 00:14:52,104
If you really think that
having sex in the toilets
210
00:14:52,229 --> 00:14:54,357
while your friend lies in a box
barely three feet away
211
00:14:54,482 --> 00:14:55,692
is the right thing to do...
212
00:14:55,817 --> 00:14:57,569
Brilliant, thanks, mate, cheers.
213
00:14:57,695 --> 00:15:00,615
You absolutely sure this is alright?
214
00:15:00,740 --> 00:15:04,370
Well, it seemed like you were gonna
keep asking me until I said yes, so...
215
00:15:04,495 --> 00:15:05,997
here you are.
216
00:15:06,122 --> 00:15:09,126
It's just that I've never been
in a cockpit before.
217
00:15:09,251 --> 00:15:11,461
Why do they call it a cockpit?
218
00:15:11,586 --> 00:15:13,673
Is it anything to do
with it having cocks in it?
219
00:15:15,258 --> 00:15:18,387
Sometimes. Yep.
220
00:15:20,015 --> 00:15:23,135
- Do you ever wish it had missiles on it?
- No. Can you just take your fingers?
221
00:15:23,159 --> 00:15:25,079
- Thanks.
- Sorry.
222
00:15:25,396 --> 00:15:28,025
Have you ever been
in an emergency situation
223
00:15:28,150 --> 00:15:30,750
where you had to fly the plane
upside down like Denzel Washington?
224
00:15:30,774 --> 00:15:31,776
No, never.
225
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:34,073
- Ever met John Travolta?
- No.
226
00:15:34,198 --> 00:15:37,494
Imagine if I was a terrorist
and I just went nuts now.
227
00:15:40,832 --> 00:15:44,045
- Have you always had a moustache?
- No.
228
00:15:44,170 --> 00:15:46,422
- What's that do?
- Yeah, no, don't, don't.
229
00:15:46,548 --> 00:15:48,133
That's the fuel line.
230
00:15:48,258 --> 00:15:50,093
Pretty, isn't it?
231
00:15:51,179 --> 00:15:52,305
Fuck.
232
00:15:52,430 --> 00:15:56,769
Now I'll be honest, I've always had
a thing for stewardesses.
233
00:15:56,894 --> 00:15:59,522
- I'm a flight attendant.
- Yeah, whatever.
234
00:15:59,647 --> 00:16:02,693
It's just that this would be
a really major thing for me
235
00:16:02,818 --> 00:16:04,487
if we could make this happen.
236
00:16:04,612 --> 00:16:08,241
Your dead friend is in that box,
just there.
237
00:16:08,366 --> 00:16:10,036
Yeah, he won't hear anything.
238
00:16:10,161 --> 00:16:14,208
- This is amazing!
- [sighs] Yep.
239
00:16:15,042 --> 00:16:17,962
- Look, birds!
- Ow, fuck! What...
240
00:16:18,088 --> 00:16:20,673
- What the fuck are you doing?
- I'm sorry.
241
00:16:21,258 --> 00:16:24,178
- What is wrong with you?
- It was an accident.
242
00:16:24,303 --> 00:16:25,806
I got to go and sort this out.
243
00:16:27,516 --> 00:16:29,685
Where are you going?
What about the plane?
244
00:16:29,811 --> 00:16:33,190
It's on auto-pilot,
don't touch anything!
245
00:16:35,734 --> 00:16:38,613
Alright, look,
forget the sex, OK?
246
00:16:38,738 --> 00:16:41,617
- How about just a snog?
- Absolutely not.
247
00:16:41,742 --> 00:16:43,244
- Janet.
- Oh.
248
00:16:45,580 --> 00:16:46,581
Hmm?
249
00:16:49,252 --> 00:16:50,294
Luftwaffe!
250
00:16:50,419 --> 00:16:52,005
[imitates machine gun]
251
00:16:53,924 --> 00:16:55,259
[beeping]
252
00:16:57,262 --> 00:16:59,097
Erm...
253
00:17:00,474 --> 00:17:02,351
There's a light.
254
00:17:06,356 --> 00:17:09,026
I'll just... tap.
255
00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:13,532
[gasps, sirens blaring]
256
00:17:13,657 --> 00:17:14,700
Hello?
257
00:17:14,826 --> 00:17:16,494
What the fuck?
258
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:20,374
Oh my God, we have
to go back to our seats.
259
00:17:20,499 --> 00:17:21,834
Captain!
260
00:17:22,544 --> 00:17:23,712
What's going on?
261
00:17:23,837 --> 00:17:25,422
What did you do?
262
00:17:25,547 --> 00:17:27,300
That button went off, so I touched it.
263
00:17:27,425 --> 00:17:29,825
You fucking moron.
What, are you trying to get us all killed?
264
00:17:29,849 --> 00:17:31,430
No.
265
00:17:31,555 --> 00:17:33,223
[screaming]
266
00:17:35,727 --> 00:17:37,854
[screaming]
267
00:17:40,524 --> 00:17:41,860
[pilot] Come on,
come on, come on.
268
00:17:41,985 --> 00:17:42,986
[screaming]
269
00:17:43,111 --> 00:17:44,154
Oh, fuck.
270
00:17:51,038 --> 00:17:52,664
[screaming]
271
00:17:57,379 --> 00:17:58,505
[screams]
272
00:18:02,010 --> 00:18:04,721
[alarm blaring]
273
00:18:06,057 --> 00:18:07,558
[mumbles]
274
00:18:09,019 --> 00:18:10,604
[flatulates]
275
00:18:10,729 --> 00:18:12,482
Could someone help me, please?
276
00:18:14,692 --> 00:18:17,029
- It wasn't my fault.
- Really?
277
00:18:17,154 --> 00:18:19,323
And whose fault was it then,
my Aunt Agatha?
278
00:18:19,448 --> 00:18:23,370
- Who?
- I told you not to touch anything!
279
00:18:23,495 --> 00:18:25,748
[David] What the hell happened?
280
00:18:25,873 --> 00:18:28,210
Your dickwad of a friend here
fucked the plane up
281
00:18:28,335 --> 00:18:30,879
and nearly got us all killed,
that's all.
282
00:18:31,004 --> 00:18:32,799
So what do we do?
283
00:18:32,924 --> 00:18:34,724
Should we try and call for help
on our phones?
284
00:18:34,748 --> 00:18:40,297
Could do, yeah.
Or we could stay out here and die.
285
00:18:44,063 --> 00:18:46,524
- I've got no reception.
- Why haven't we got any reception?
286
00:18:47,598 --> 00:18:50,017
Because we're in the middle
of bumfuck nowhere, that's why.
287
00:18:50,768 --> 00:18:54,439
Personally, I'm going to go
and see if I can find some help.
288
00:18:54,564 --> 00:18:56,025
Yeah, wait for me.
289
00:18:57,235 --> 00:18:59,796
- We should really go with him, David.
- [David] What about Luke?
290
00:18:59,820 --> 00:19:00,905
We'll come back for him.
291
00:19:03,826 --> 00:19:05,495
I'm not leaving him.
292
00:19:05,620 --> 00:19:07,461
You go and send back the help
when you find it.
293
00:19:07,581 --> 00:19:10,377
- I think we should all stay together.
- Fine, then we stay here.
294
00:19:10,502 --> 00:19:12,837
Er... hang on.
295
00:19:12,963 --> 00:19:14,715
Hey?
296
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:16,509
OK, last go.
297
00:19:16,634 --> 00:19:17,761
So, what are the chances
298
00:19:17,886 --> 00:19:20,566
anything could ever come of what
we were talking about on the plane?
299
00:19:21,515 --> 00:19:24,644
- Fuck... off!
- Fair enough.
300
00:19:24,769 --> 00:19:26,272
[pilot] Come on, Janet, let's go.
301
00:19:26,397 --> 00:19:28,190
OK, fine, we'll stay.
302
00:19:29,985 --> 00:19:32,862
- It bloody stinks around here.
- Yeah.
303
00:19:32,988 --> 00:19:35,908
- That might be me.
- What do you mean?
304
00:19:36,033 --> 00:19:38,829
- I shat myself on that plane.
- We all shat ourselves, Graham.
305
00:19:38,954 --> 00:19:40,622
It was fucking terrifying.
306
00:19:40,748 --> 00:19:43,710
No, I mean, I actually shat myself.
307
00:19:43,835 --> 00:19:46,547
- Jesus, Graham.
- Oh, man.
308
00:19:46,672 --> 00:19:48,299
Go and change, for God's sake.
309
00:19:48,425 --> 00:19:52,095
Yeah, yeah.
310
00:19:52,220 --> 00:19:54,515
- [flatulates]
- Oh.
311
00:19:56,393 --> 00:19:58,687
For fuck's sake.
312
00:20:02,442 --> 00:20:04,987
[Graham] Where are they?
They've been hours.
313
00:20:06,613 --> 00:20:08,491
What do you think
we should do then?
314
00:20:08,616 --> 00:20:11,871
I think we should leave this death pit
and go and find help.
315
00:20:11,996 --> 00:20:14,498
- Alright.
- Alright.
316
00:20:18,837 --> 00:20:20,423
Guys.
317
00:20:22,175 --> 00:20:24,011
We're taking Luke.
318
00:20:24,970 --> 00:20:27,223
What, are you mental?
We can't carry that thing.
319
00:20:27,349 --> 00:20:29,726
That thing is one
of your best friends.
320
00:20:29,851 --> 00:20:31,652
If we leave him here,
he's going to decompose.
321
00:20:31,729 --> 00:20:33,009
We need to get him refrigerated.
322
00:20:33,033 --> 00:20:35,734
We can't carry him,
David, he's too heavy.
323
00:20:35,859 --> 00:20:39,739
You know, I hate to agree with Graham,
but in this case he's right, David.
324
00:20:39,864 --> 00:20:43,202
Lugging his body across
the outback, it's insanity.
325
00:20:48,124 --> 00:20:49,417
OK, fine.
326
00:20:50,711 --> 00:20:52,254
Come on.
327
00:21:13,615 --> 00:21:16,201
[David] See, it's not actually
that heavy.
328
00:21:16,326 --> 00:21:19,205
[Graham] Oh, it fucking is.
329
00:21:19,330 --> 00:21:23,877
[Tom] Oh, we're gonna be fine,
just this way.
330
00:21:24,002 --> 00:21:26,131
Probably a pub around here
somewhere, I reckon.
331
00:21:26,256 --> 00:21:28,049
[Graham] Fucking crocodile
in here, I bet.
332
00:21:34,808 --> 00:21:38,020
[groans] Oh, God,
I can't do this anymore.
333
00:21:38,146 --> 00:21:40,399
I feel like my fingers
are about to snap off.
334
00:21:40,524 --> 00:21:42,568
[David] Shut up, Graham.
335
00:21:42,693 --> 00:21:44,334
[Graham] Seriously,
my back is really bad.
336
00:21:44,362 --> 00:21:45,864
[David and Tom] Shut up, Graham.
337
00:21:45,989 --> 00:21:47,908
[Graham] I reckon
it's probably worse than yours
338
00:21:48,033 --> 00:21:50,713
- because I've got the heavy end.
- [David and Tom] Shut up, Graham.
339
00:21:50,737 --> 00:21:52,581
Right that's it,
we're swapping over.
340
00:21:52,706 --> 00:21:54,374
- You take this end.
- No, no way.
341
00:21:54,499 --> 00:21:56,228
That's your end. David's got the front,
I've got the middle.
342
00:21:56,252 --> 00:21:57,587
We are all used to our positions.
343
00:21:57,712 --> 00:21:59,107
That is the lamest thing
I've ever heard.
344
00:21:59,131 --> 00:22:00,525
You're the lamest thing
I have ever heard.
345
00:22:00,549 --> 00:22:02,709
Yeah? Well your mum's
the lamest thing I've ever heard.
346
00:22:02,733 --> 00:22:05,430
- Your mum's got a beard.
- She's got hormonal problems, Tom.
347
00:22:05,555 --> 00:22:07,808
Can you just stop it?
348
00:22:08,809 --> 00:22:11,646
If we don't get Luke's body
back to London before it goes moldy,
349
00:22:12,647 --> 00:22:14,817
Henry's going to actually
kill us, isn't he?
350
00:22:14,942 --> 00:22:17,278
Quite possibly, yes.
351
00:22:17,403 --> 00:22:20,574
Remember when that kid at school
took a bite of Luke's sandwich?
352
00:22:20,699 --> 00:22:22,952
Henry got hold of the kid,
stuck his head in a urinal
353
00:22:23,077 --> 00:22:24,495
and then pissed on it.
354
00:22:24,621 --> 00:22:26,582
[in unison] Piss-face John Tait.
355
00:22:26,707 --> 00:22:28,167
[chuckles]
356
00:22:29,293 --> 00:22:31,671
[Graham] I'm never walking again.
357
00:22:31,796 --> 00:22:35,760
If we ever make it back to London,
I'm getting a wheelchair.
358
00:22:35,885 --> 00:22:40,307
I'm just gonna tell everyone I'm disabled
and get someone to wheel me around.
359
00:22:40,432 --> 00:22:44,145
[all] Oh, oh, oh,
no, no, no, no, no, no.
360
00:22:44,270 --> 00:22:46,607
[David] I think I can see a road.
361
00:22:46,732 --> 00:22:48,902
- Oh, my God.
- [Graham] Where?
362
00:22:49,027 --> 00:22:51,488
[David] Just up there,
do you see it?
363
00:22:51,613 --> 00:22:52,949
[Tom] Not really.
364
00:22:53,074 --> 00:22:54,992
[David] It definitely
looks like a road.
365
00:22:55,117 --> 00:22:57,204
[grunting]
366
00:23:01,334 --> 00:23:03,628
[Graham] You said
there was a road!
367
00:23:04,421 --> 00:23:06,048
[David] I thought there was.
368
00:23:06,173 --> 00:23:08,008
So what do we do now?
369
00:23:11,721 --> 00:23:15,142
- We need to learn from this.
- We're going to die from this.
370
00:23:15,268 --> 00:23:19,356
We need to grow
from this experience. All of us.
371
00:23:20,817 --> 00:23:24,363
That's true, actually.
Especially Graham.
372
00:23:25,030 --> 00:23:26,532
What, what does that mean?
373
00:23:26,657 --> 00:23:30,245
Not just Graham, Tom.
You as well, especially you, in fact.
374
00:23:30,370 --> 00:23:31,956
Why especially me?
375
00:23:32,081 --> 00:23:35,294
Because you're well into your thirties,
you still behave like a horny schoolboy.
376
00:23:36,962 --> 00:23:39,632
You say that
like it's a bad thing, David.
377
00:23:39,757 --> 00:23:40,967
And you crashed the plane.
378
00:23:41,092 --> 00:23:43,721
- It was an accident.
- It was not an accident.
379
00:23:43,846 --> 00:23:45,597
Yes, it was.
It could've happened to anyone.
380
00:23:45,723 --> 00:23:48,476
- He left me by myself.
- I feel like we're stunted.
381
00:23:50,103 --> 00:23:52,440
All this bickering,
the little snide remarks.
382
00:23:54,108 --> 00:23:57,738
We've got a chance to live our lives.
A chance that Luke didn't have.
383
00:24:00,074 --> 00:24:02,453
If there was any justice at all,
384
00:24:03,912 --> 00:24:05,665
Luke would still be alive.
385
00:24:05,790 --> 00:24:07,500
[Graham] I don't think
I can move anymore.
386
00:24:07,625 --> 00:24:11,839
We're in the middle of nowhere,
totally, totally fucked.
387
00:24:13,592 --> 00:24:16,386
[thunder rumbling]
388
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:30,821
Look!
389
00:24:30,946 --> 00:24:33,617
- Wait. Stop, wait.
- Wait!
390
00:24:36,036 --> 00:24:37,455
- Stop!
- Hurry up!
391
00:24:37,580 --> 00:24:38,956
Stop!
392
00:24:39,082 --> 00:24:40,584
[shouting indistinctly]
393
00:24:40,709 --> 00:24:43,087
[panting]
394
00:24:45,382 --> 00:24:46,883
[Graham] There's another one.
395
00:24:48,761 --> 00:24:50,221
Stop!
396
00:24:50,346 --> 00:24:52,099
[David] What is that?
397
00:24:52,224 --> 00:24:53,558
♪ Take a little bit ♪
398
00:24:53,683 --> 00:24:55,770
♪ You're a back seat driver ♪
399
00:24:55,895 --> 00:24:58,231
♪ Take a little ♪
400
00:24:58,356 --> 00:25:00,317
- [Graham] Oh, my God.
- Are you boys OK?
401
00:25:00,901 --> 00:25:03,863
Yeah, thank you so much
for stopping.
402
00:25:03,988 --> 00:25:06,533
- What are you guys doing here?
- It's a long story, but...
403
00:25:07,618 --> 00:25:10,871
Basically, we were in a plane
and it crashed.
404
00:25:10,997 --> 00:25:13,708
You had a plane crash?
Bloody hell!
405
00:25:14,543 --> 00:25:16,796
Yeah, he crashed it.
406
00:25:16,921 --> 00:25:18,381
[David] Is there any way
407
00:25:18,506 --> 00:25:21,051
you could take us
to the nearest town?
408
00:25:21,176 --> 00:25:22,887
Sure, come on.
409
00:25:24,180 --> 00:25:26,767
- Amazing.
- Yeah, no worries.
410
00:25:26,892 --> 00:25:28,686
Thank you.
411
00:25:28,811 --> 00:25:29,979
Don't forget your box.
412
00:25:30,522 --> 00:25:31,940
We won't.
413
00:25:32,065 --> 00:25:33,650
- [Angie] What's in that thing?
- Huh?
414
00:25:35,445 --> 00:25:36,446
Sorry?
415
00:25:37,238 --> 00:25:39,241
- What's in the box?
- That box?
416
00:25:39,825 --> 00:25:41,410
[Angie] Yeah, the massive box.
417
00:25:42,036 --> 00:25:43,705
It's, um...
418
00:25:46,834 --> 00:25:48,377
It's meat.
419
00:25:49,253 --> 00:25:50,380
It's meat. [chuckles]
420
00:25:50,505 --> 00:25:55,011
Yeah, we're transporting
a load of... meat.
421
00:25:56,971 --> 00:25:59,600
Yeah, alright.
Why don't you stick it in the back?
422
00:26:00,977 --> 00:26:03,938
[Graham] So, um, where are
you guys actually headed then?
423
00:26:04,063 --> 00:26:06,358
[Angie] We're going to this
little underground festival.
424
00:26:06,901 --> 00:26:08,402
A festival?
425
00:26:08,528 --> 00:26:10,989
Yeah, you guys should come.
It'll be fun.
426
00:26:11,865 --> 00:26:15,745
Lots of drinking, drugs, fucking,
that sort of thing.
427
00:26:18,707 --> 00:26:20,627
- David?
- Absolutely not.
428
00:26:20,752 --> 00:26:23,063
- You don't know what I'm gonna say.
- I know exactly what you're gonna say.
429
00:26:23,087 --> 00:26:24,888
You're gonna say
we should go to the festival,
430
00:26:24,965 --> 00:26:27,593
and there's no way on earth
that's happening.
431
00:26:27,719 --> 00:26:29,999
- Are you feeling sick?
- No, just looking out the window.
432
00:26:30,055 --> 00:26:32,016
- Nice view.
- It is a nice view.
433
00:26:32,141 --> 00:26:34,477
- It's beautiful out here.
- Lovely, very nice.
434
00:26:34,602 --> 00:26:35,938
We need to get Luke home.
435
00:26:36,063 --> 00:26:38,732
We're not sticking around
so you can try and get laid.
436
00:26:38,857 --> 00:26:41,694
Actually, I'm not thinking
of getting laid at all.
437
00:26:41,819 --> 00:26:43,405
I'm thinking of going to the festival
438
00:26:43,531 --> 00:26:46,617
because there'll be food and drink
and a telephone, yeah?
439
00:26:47,410 --> 00:26:49,246
And maybe even a fridge
for the meat.
440
00:26:49,371 --> 00:26:50,915
What does this switch do?
441
00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:53,084
Ah, that one's for the party lights.
442
00:26:53,209 --> 00:26:54,920
I probably shouldn't touch switches.
443
00:26:55,045 --> 00:26:57,297
OK, fine, whatever.
444
00:26:57,422 --> 00:27:01,219
- Graham, do not touch any switches!
- I was just wondering what that one did.
445
00:27:01,344 --> 00:27:03,389
[horn beeping]
446
00:27:11,274 --> 00:27:14,278
Boys! You brought boys!
447
00:27:14,403 --> 00:27:15,988
Excellent!
448
00:27:16,113 --> 00:27:18,533
- Who's that?
- That is Felicity.
449
00:27:18,658 --> 00:27:20,076
She owns the place.
450
00:27:20,201 --> 00:27:22,413
What are you gonna do
with your big box of meat?
451
00:27:22,538 --> 00:27:25,124
- [Felicity] You've brought meat?
- Yeah.
452
00:27:25,249 --> 00:27:27,627
- Come with me.
- [Lisa] See you in there, guys.
453
00:27:27,752 --> 00:27:29,880
[Felicity] This way
to the Felicity festival.
454
00:27:30,006 --> 00:27:32,174
One for you, large for you,
some for you.
455
00:27:32,925 --> 00:27:35,137
[shirtless guy] Condoms,
get your free condoms.
456
00:27:35,262 --> 00:27:36,805
[up-tempo techno music]
457
00:27:55,412 --> 00:27:56,581
Hi.
458
00:27:56,706 --> 00:27:59,334
Hey, how are you?
459
00:27:59,459 --> 00:28:01,337
Hey.
460
00:28:06,926 --> 00:28:09,305
[Felicity] OK, just put it
right down there.
461
00:28:16,689 --> 00:28:19,151
- Alright, I'll see you in a bit.
- Where are you going?
462
00:28:19,276 --> 00:28:21,070
I'm just gonna have a whazz.
463
00:28:21,195 --> 00:28:22,821
- See ya.
- Graham...
464
00:28:22,948 --> 00:28:25,468
I'm gonna go and use the phone.
Keep an eye on that fridge area.
465
00:28:25,492 --> 00:28:27,328
Make sure no-one goes in
and finds Luke.
466
00:28:27,453 --> 00:28:29,956
What, you expect me
to just stand here by myself?
467
00:28:30,081 --> 00:28:32,167
Yeah, that's right.
468
00:28:38,467 --> 00:28:40,302
- Hi.
- Hey!
469
00:28:40,427 --> 00:28:42,931
- You guys look absolutely amazing.
- Thanks.
470
00:28:44,057 --> 00:28:47,144
Wow, when did all this
actually start?
471
00:28:47,269 --> 00:28:48,604
Days ago.
472
00:28:48,729 --> 00:28:51,775
It happens every year
when Felicity's husband goes off.
473
00:28:51,900 --> 00:28:54,112
Everyone gets fucked up
and goes mental.
474
00:28:54,237 --> 00:28:55,238
[screaming]
475
00:28:57,031 --> 00:28:59,535
[phone rings]
476
00:29:04,457 --> 00:29:05,501
Mum!
477
00:29:05,626 --> 00:29:08,129
[phone keeps ringing]
478
00:29:08,254 --> 00:29:10,007
Mummy!
479
00:29:13,219 --> 00:29:16,305
- Can you seriously not hear that?
- Hear what?
480
00:29:18,934 --> 00:29:22,105
- Hello?
- Henry? Henry, it's David.
481
00:29:22,230 --> 00:29:24,274
David, where the fuck are you?
482
00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:26,235
Listen, everything's fine.
483
00:29:26,360 --> 00:29:28,761
We just had a bit of a problem.
We're gonna be a bit delayed.
484
00:29:28,785 --> 00:29:30,913
What kind of problem?
485
00:29:31,533 --> 00:29:32,994
The plane crashed.
486
00:29:34,412 --> 00:29:36,749
- You what?
- But don't worry, Luke's fine.
487
00:29:36,874 --> 00:29:38,709
I mean, we're going
to get him back home.
488
00:29:38,834 --> 00:29:41,254
Well, he's not fine, is he?
489
00:29:41,379 --> 00:29:45,718
He's dead. I wouldn't exactly
constitute dead as fine. Would you?
490
00:29:45,843 --> 00:29:49,765
Well, no, I mean his body's fine.
We're going to get him back home.
491
00:29:49,890 --> 00:29:52,769
Well, how long? The funeral's
already organized and paid for.
492
00:29:52,894 --> 00:29:55,021
It's all going to happen
in a few days.
493
00:29:55,647 --> 00:29:57,232
We'll make it back, I promise.
494
00:29:57,858 --> 00:29:59,819
You remember what I told you, David.
495
00:30:00,862 --> 00:30:02,197
I do, I remember.
496
00:30:03,199 --> 00:30:06,243
It's all going to be fine.
I've got it all under control.
497
00:30:06,368 --> 00:30:08,830
Balls, piss, shit, tits!
498
00:30:10,583 --> 00:30:12,877
- Henry?
- Who the fuck was that?
499
00:30:13,002 --> 00:30:16,340
Er... we just, it's no-one, um...
500
00:30:16,465 --> 00:30:18,551
Are you at some kind of party?
501
00:30:18,676 --> 00:30:20,136
What? No, it's...
502
00:30:20,261 --> 00:30:23,182
It's not really a party.
It's more of a festival.
503
00:30:23,307 --> 00:30:24,308
A festival?
504
00:30:24,433 --> 00:30:26,686
We're in a town near Perth.
505
00:30:26,812 --> 00:30:28,105
Do you mind?
506
00:30:30,650 --> 00:30:32,860
Listen, we're going to get him
back home in one...
507
00:30:32,985 --> 00:30:35,072
Mate, I need to make a call.
508
00:30:35,197 --> 00:30:36,573
It's an emergency.
509
00:30:36,698 --> 00:30:38,326
Won't be a minute.
510
00:30:38,451 --> 00:30:39,786
Sorry about that, Henry.
511
00:30:39,911 --> 00:30:41,205
[dial tone]
512
00:30:41,831 --> 00:30:44,708
Bill, mate?
We need more beer.
513
00:30:46,336 --> 00:30:48,004
Yeah, now.
514
00:30:49,006 --> 00:30:51,843
What do you mean, you can't?
Fucking arsehole!
515
00:30:58,226 --> 00:30:59,644
Sorry, mate.
516
00:31:02,273 --> 00:31:04,514
- [woman] Oh get out of it, you perv!
- Oh, sorry, sorry.
517
00:31:04,568 --> 00:31:05,944
I feel like I'm dying.
518
00:31:06,069 --> 00:31:08,406
You're not dying.
You just need to eat something.
519
00:31:08,531 --> 00:31:10,199
Now, you wait here.
520
00:31:10,324 --> 00:31:14,037
I'm going to make you
a nice, big, juicy...
521
00:31:15,915 --> 00:31:17,458
corpse.
522
00:31:19,502 --> 00:31:21,005
[throws up]
523
00:31:26,344 --> 00:31:28,306
[woman 1] Hey, did you hear
they found a body?
524
00:31:28,431 --> 00:31:29,807
[woman 2] A what?
525
00:31:29,932 --> 00:31:32,561
[woman 1] A body.
Felicity found a dead guy in the kitchen.
526
00:31:32,686 --> 00:31:35,166
- [woman 2] Who is it?
- [woman 1] I don't know, just some guy.
527
00:31:35,213 --> 00:31:37,933
- [woman 2] Let's go take a look.
- [woman 1] Do you think we should?
528
00:31:37,957 --> 00:31:39,270
[woman 2] Yeah.
529
00:31:41,572 --> 00:31:43,408
They've found him.
530
00:31:45,619 --> 00:31:47,205
[Lisa] So, here's an idea.
531
00:31:47,330 --> 00:31:49,540
Want to have a threesome
with me and my mate?
532
00:31:49,665 --> 00:31:51,418
Eh?
533
00:31:51,543 --> 00:31:54,130
Oh, if you're not into it,
I totally get it, it's...
534
00:31:54,255 --> 00:31:56,257
No, of course I'm bloody into it.
535
00:31:56,382 --> 00:31:59,386
Well, hang on, you don't mean
a threesome with a bloke, do you?
536
00:31:59,511 --> 00:32:01,180
No, of course not.
537
00:32:01,305 --> 00:32:03,892
It's my friend Heidi.
Have you seen her?
538
00:32:04,017 --> 00:32:05,728
She's gorgeous.
539
00:32:05,853 --> 00:32:08,439
She's pretty filthy too,
so if you don't want to, I get it.
540
00:32:08,564 --> 00:32:10,901
No, it's OK,
I don't discriminate.
541
00:32:11,026 --> 00:32:12,986
OK, great.
542
00:32:13,111 --> 00:32:14,572
So I'll go get her then, shall I?
543
00:32:14,697 --> 00:32:16,032
Yeah.
544
00:32:16,491 --> 00:32:18,661
Er... OK.
545
00:32:19,620 --> 00:32:21,706
Oh, yeah... Oh!
546
00:32:23,667 --> 00:32:24,961
[gasping]
547
00:32:25,544 --> 00:32:27,505
I know, why don't we paint him?
548
00:32:27,630 --> 00:32:29,841
That's a fucking brilliant idea.
549
00:32:29,967 --> 00:32:31,426
[cheering]
550
00:32:34,681 --> 00:32:38,185
Tom, thank God. We need you.
They've got Luke.
551
00:32:38,686 --> 00:32:39,687
What?
552
00:32:39,812 --> 00:32:41,813
They've found Luke.
We've gotta go and sort it out.
553
00:32:41,837 --> 00:32:44,277
Alright, you guys go and do that.
I'll catch you up in a bit.
554
00:32:44,402 --> 00:32:46,821
- What do you mean? You're coming too.
- I can't.
555
00:32:47,405 --> 00:32:52,412
- What do you mean, you can't?
- That girl, Lisa, she is... threesome.
556
00:32:53,121 --> 00:32:54,664
- What?
- We're gonna have a threesome.
557
00:32:54,789 --> 00:32:56,542
Me, her and her mate.
558
00:32:57,459 --> 00:33:00,297
- We don't have time to discuss this.
- You two need to fuck off.
559
00:33:00,422 --> 00:33:04,844
- Just come on.
- No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
560
00:33:07,306 --> 00:33:10,475
- Hey, what's going on?
- Er... I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
561
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:12,854
- Oh.
- Damn!
562
00:33:12,979 --> 00:33:15,441
[humming]
563
00:33:22,324 --> 00:33:25,077
[rhythmic music]
564
00:33:36,216 --> 00:33:38,511
[crowd cheering]
565
00:33:44,143 --> 00:33:46,605
[up-tempo music]
566
00:33:51,944 --> 00:33:54,573
Stop! Stop! Stop!
567
00:33:56,283 --> 00:33:57,827
Stop.
568
00:33:58,453 --> 00:33:59,954
That's our friend.
569
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:03,751
Well what the fuck are you bringing
your dead friend to a festival for?
570
00:34:04,251 --> 00:34:05,962
We're trying to get his body home.
571
00:34:06,088 --> 00:34:07,631
A snake bit my cock!
572
00:34:07,756 --> 00:34:09,926
A snake bit my cock!
A snake bit my cock!
573
00:34:10,051 --> 00:34:11,719
[crowd chattering]
574
00:34:19,270 --> 00:34:20,731
Graham, come on.
575
00:34:32,830 --> 00:34:34,665
Let's go. Go! Go!
576
00:34:34,790 --> 00:34:36,876
[grunting]
577
00:34:51,019 --> 00:34:54,566
You need to go to Perth
and bring Luke back.
578
00:34:54,691 --> 00:34:57,318
You can't trust those boys.
579
00:34:57,444 --> 00:34:59,864
I'm not going to Perth.
It's on the other side of the planet.
580
00:34:59,989 --> 00:35:01,365
What?
581
00:35:01,490 --> 00:35:04,202
I'm not going to Perth,
it's miles away.
582
00:35:04,327 --> 00:35:07,748
- You need to go to Perth.
- I'm not going to Perth.
583
00:35:07,874 --> 00:35:10,335
You need to get
on the next flight out there.
584
00:35:10,461 --> 00:35:11,879
I'm not going!
585
00:35:12,337 --> 00:35:14,007
Good!
586
00:35:14,132 --> 00:35:16,050
You go over and meet them
587
00:35:16,176 --> 00:35:20,347
and make sure you bring Luke back
in time for the funeral.
588
00:35:20,473 --> 00:35:22,017
It's all paid for.
589
00:35:22,142 --> 00:35:27,064
Alright, I'll fucking go,
to fucking Perth, for fuck's sake!
590
00:35:29,443 --> 00:35:32,029
[birds squawking]
591
00:35:38,329 --> 00:35:40,164
I still can't believe it.
592
00:35:40,289 --> 00:35:42,918
A bloody threesome.
A threesome!
593
00:35:43,043 --> 00:35:46,047
It's alright for you two,
you don't understand this stuff.
594
00:35:46,172 --> 00:35:48,634
But I depend on these
deviant sexual experiences
595
00:35:48,759 --> 00:35:51,178
to give my life some sense
of meaning.
596
00:35:52,347 --> 00:35:54,098
[Graham] Boys,
597
00:35:54,224 --> 00:35:56,810
does anyone else think
this box looks a bit like a penis?
598
00:35:57,603 --> 00:35:59,313
[Tom] It does a bit.
599
00:35:59,438 --> 00:36:00,732
A big gold cock.
600
00:36:00,857 --> 00:36:02,484
[Graham] It's got a helmet.
601
00:36:11,955 --> 00:36:15,124
[clanking]
602
00:36:21,424 --> 00:36:23,427
Hi, everyone.
603
00:36:24,262 --> 00:36:26,639
Sorry to disturb you all,
604
00:36:26,765 --> 00:36:30,687
but we really need a lift
as far to Perth as possible.
605
00:36:31,729 --> 00:36:33,815
Is there anyone that might
be able to help us out?
606
00:36:44,078 --> 00:36:46,331
Yeah, I'll take youse.
607
00:36:47,708 --> 00:36:51,254
- Thank you so much.
- No worries, ten minutes, OK?
608
00:36:52,297 --> 00:36:54,133
Perfect.
609
00:36:54,258 --> 00:36:56,343
Hey.
610
00:37:10,695 --> 00:37:15,117
- What's in the box?
- Oh, erm... it's our mate.
611
00:37:15,242 --> 00:37:16,870
- Eh?
- Yeah.
612
00:37:16,995 --> 00:37:18,455
So that's his coffin.
613
00:37:18,580 --> 00:37:21,167
- Yeah.
- Eh? Dead, is he?
614
00:37:21,917 --> 00:37:23,210
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
615
00:37:24,463 --> 00:37:27,299
You don't want to be wheeling him
around like that. Not in this heat.
616
00:37:27,424 --> 00:37:29,025
- No, I know.
- You wanna get him buried.
617
00:37:29,135 --> 00:37:30,895
- Yeah, I know that.
- He'll start going bad.
618
00:37:30,919 --> 00:37:32,097
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
619
00:37:32,222 --> 00:37:34,892
- Thanks for the advice.
- Yeah, no. No worries.
620
00:37:35,017 --> 00:37:38,688
Anyway, you just stick your mate in
the back of my truck and we'll head off.
621
00:37:40,399 --> 00:37:43,152
Thank you so much again.
This is such an incredible help.
622
00:37:43,277 --> 00:37:45,072
Yeah, no worries.
623
00:37:45,197 --> 00:37:47,825
I'll just take a piss
and then we'll head off.
624
00:37:47,950 --> 00:37:50,161
Uh, which truck is it?
625
00:37:51,205 --> 00:37:53,749
It's the white one out the back
to the left, handsome.
626
00:37:58,881 --> 00:37:59,882
- Right.
- Right.
627
00:38:10,103 --> 00:38:11,563
[all] Two, three.
628
00:38:11,689 --> 00:38:13,440
[grunting]
629
00:38:13,565 --> 00:38:15,568
Slow, slow, slow!
630
00:38:17,529 --> 00:38:19,156
[grunts]
631
00:38:23,036 --> 00:38:24,996
[Graham] Get the side up.
632
00:38:33,121 --> 00:38:35,541
OK, we're ready.
633
00:38:35,666 --> 00:38:38,420
- Righto, let's go.
- Great.
634
00:38:40,797 --> 00:38:42,717
- Er...
- Ah?
635
00:38:42,842 --> 00:38:45,679
- Sorry, where are you going?
- [Eric] To my truck.
636
00:38:45,804 --> 00:38:47,306
Your truck's over there, mate.
637
00:38:47,431 --> 00:38:49,225
No, it isn't.
638
00:38:51,937 --> 00:38:55,650
- You said the white one on the left.
- Did I say left?
639
00:38:56,485 --> 00:38:58,153
I meant right. Sorry.
640
00:38:58,278 --> 00:39:00,030
I'm always getting them two
muddled up.
641
00:39:00,155 --> 00:39:01,240
- What?
- What?
642
00:39:01,366 --> 00:39:02,700
- Huh?
- Mm?
643
00:39:02,825 --> 00:39:04,035
It's there.
644
00:39:04,161 --> 00:39:06,914
- Er... er, it's going.
- What?
645
00:39:07,039 --> 00:39:09,417
- The truck. It's going.
- Wait, wait.
646
00:39:09,542 --> 00:39:11,378
- No, stop.
- Wait. Stop.
647
00:39:11,503 --> 00:39:14,048
- Oh, that's funny.
- Wait!
648
00:39:14,715 --> 00:39:16,843
- Wait, wait.
- Stop, stop.
649
00:39:16,969 --> 00:39:18,971
- Stop.
- Stop.
650
00:39:23,602 --> 00:39:25,646
[Tom] What the fuck?
651
00:39:26,855 --> 00:39:28,733
Eric...
652
00:39:29,526 --> 00:39:31,904
[Graham] Hey, hey.
653
00:39:32,029 --> 00:39:34,448
[grunting]
654
00:39:36,034 --> 00:39:38,705
Well, what did you do?
Put your penis in the wrong truck?
655
00:39:38,830 --> 00:39:40,510
Yes, we need to catch up with it,
let's go.
656
00:39:40,534 --> 00:39:41,994
Righto.
657
00:39:44,294 --> 00:39:45,963
- Quick.
- Quickly.
658
00:39:47,424 --> 00:39:50,219
- [Graham] Can you hurry up, please?
- Yeah, righto.
659
00:39:54,057 --> 00:39:56,268
[groans] Bad hip.
660
00:39:59,397 --> 00:40:01,149
Let's go.
661
00:40:01,274 --> 00:40:04,153
- Righto, seat belts on.
- Come on, please.
662
00:40:09,785 --> 00:40:12,079
[panting] Quickly! Quickly!
663
00:40:23,218 --> 00:40:24,553
[Eric] Almost made it.
664
00:40:24,678 --> 00:40:26,599
[Graham] Sorry,
but we've really got to hurry up.
665
00:40:26,723 --> 00:40:28,558
[Eric] Yeah, righto.
666
00:40:28,684 --> 00:40:30,644
- Am I clear at the back?
- Yes!
667
00:40:30,770 --> 00:40:32,731
Yes, you're fine.
668
00:40:33,774 --> 00:40:35,567
- [David] Come on, please.
- [Tom] Go.
669
00:40:35,692 --> 00:40:38,029
- [Graham] Hey, let's go.
- [Eric] And we're off.
670
00:40:39,989 --> 00:40:41,992
[humming]
671
00:40:52,631 --> 00:40:56,010
Can you please just put more pressure
on the accelerator pedal?
672
00:40:56,135 --> 00:40:58,346
I don't want to get a speeding ticket.
673
00:40:58,471 --> 00:41:01,100
I'll pay the ticket, I'll pay double!
674
00:41:01,225 --> 00:41:03,603
I don't like being indebted to people.
675
00:41:05,105 --> 00:41:07,316
Just put your foot down
on the fucking accelerator!
676
00:41:07,441 --> 00:41:10,319
Jesus, keep your hair on, will ya?
677
00:41:11,655 --> 00:41:12,864
You really should've checked
678
00:41:12,989 --> 00:41:16,035
before you put your penis
in the wrong truck, you know?
679
00:41:16,953 --> 00:41:18,831
[humming]
680
00:41:21,458 --> 00:41:23,545
This is no good.
681
00:41:23,670 --> 00:41:25,171
He's gone.
682
00:41:25,964 --> 00:41:27,925
Just stop the truck, please.
683
00:41:28,050 --> 00:41:30,053
Just stop the truck!
684
00:41:32,806 --> 00:41:34,851
Fucking, God, fuck!
685
00:41:36,018 --> 00:41:37,771
[grunts]
686
00:41:42,068 --> 00:41:43,611
Fuck!
687
00:41:45,364 --> 00:41:47,241
Fuck!
688
00:41:47,366 --> 00:41:49,327
[cows mooing]
689
00:42:07,349 --> 00:42:09,186
Right.
690
00:42:09,311 --> 00:42:10,812
What do we do?
691
00:42:10,937 --> 00:42:12,982
What are our options?
692
00:42:13,107 --> 00:42:15,943
Yeah, it's not gonna be easy
tracing a white truck.
693
00:42:16,068 --> 00:42:18,488
Every fucker seems to have one.
694
00:42:18,614 --> 00:42:20,491
Did either of you
see the number plate?
695
00:42:20,617 --> 00:42:22,202
Nah.
696
00:42:22,327 --> 00:42:24,914
- I saw it.
- You did?
697
00:42:25,039 --> 00:42:26,665
That's amazing, what was it?
698
00:42:26,790 --> 00:42:28,668
- I can't remember.
- What do you mean?
699
00:42:28,793 --> 00:42:30,313
Well, I wasn't really
paying attention.
700
00:42:30,378 --> 00:42:33,219
Why weren't you paying attention?
You should always be paying attention.
701
00:42:33,243 --> 00:42:35,802
Well, I'm sorry. I mean,
I didn't know this was gonna happen!
702
00:42:35,928 --> 00:42:38,248
I'm never going to remember
if you two keep shouting at me.
703
00:42:38,374 --> 00:42:39,615
No, he's right, he's right. OK.
704
00:42:39,709 --> 00:42:41,643
Look, we all need
to just calm down, OK?
705
00:42:42,435 --> 00:42:45,189
Now just think back, think.
706
00:42:46,398 --> 00:42:49,152
It was a name,
it was a weird name.
707
00:42:49,903 --> 00:42:51,197
Great.
708
00:42:52,031 --> 00:42:53,157
And what was it?
709
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:55,702
It was, erm...
710
00:42:56,203 --> 00:42:58,080
It was...
711
00:42:58,706 --> 00:42:59,749
Just think.
712
00:43:00,541 --> 00:43:02,753
Relax and think.
713
00:43:03,879 --> 00:43:05,756
It's inside you, Graham.
714
00:43:07,008 --> 00:43:08,343
It's, er...
715
00:43:08,468 --> 00:43:10,221
[David] You can do it, Graham.
716
00:43:11,597 --> 00:43:12,598
It's gone.
717
00:43:12,723 --> 00:43:15,044
What do you mean it's gone?
Just think, just fucking think!
718
00:43:15,068 --> 00:43:17,437
Why can't you ever
get anything right?
719
00:43:17,563 --> 00:43:19,148
What the hell
is that supposed to mean?
720
00:43:19,274 --> 00:43:21,109
Well let's just think, shall we?
721
00:43:21,234 --> 00:43:22,236
You crashed the plane.
722
00:43:22,361 --> 00:43:24,401
You didn't stay with Luke
when you were supposed to.
723
00:43:24,488 --> 00:43:27,659
You basically fuck up everything
you've ever been involved in!
724
00:43:27,784 --> 00:43:29,954
- He's out of order.
- David, just calm down a bit.
725
00:43:30,079 --> 00:43:31,747
I can't calm down!
726
00:43:31,872 --> 00:43:34,793
I'm responsible for this!
Don't you get it?
727
00:43:36,003 --> 00:43:39,382
Luke wouldn't even have been
in Australia if it wasn't for me.
728
00:43:39,507 --> 00:43:41,093
And now he's dead.
729
00:43:42,177 --> 00:43:43,637
And the very least I can do
730
00:43:43,762 --> 00:43:45,640
is deliver him to his aunt
in one piece.
731
00:43:47,434 --> 00:43:50,187
If I can't do that one
little thing for him,
732
00:43:51,856 --> 00:43:54,192
how am I ever gonna
live with myself?
733
00:43:56,154 --> 00:43:58,197
Mate.
734
00:44:00,534 --> 00:44:01,994
I'm sorry, brother.
735
00:44:06,374 --> 00:44:07,375
Mmh.
736
00:44:08,336 --> 00:44:10,129
Mungus.
737
00:44:10,254 --> 00:44:12,424
- What?
- Mungus.
738
00:44:12,549 --> 00:44:14,551
The number plate,
it said Mungus.
739
00:44:14,676 --> 00:44:16,012
- Mungus?
- Mungus.
740
00:44:16,137 --> 00:44:18,848
- Are you sure?
- Yeah, I'm sure.
741
00:44:21,769 --> 00:44:24,439
Eric, do you know where
the nearest police station is?
742
00:44:24,564 --> 00:44:27,193
Yeah, no, yeah.
743
00:44:43,963 --> 00:44:45,715
- What, is this it?
- Yeah.
744
00:44:47,635 --> 00:44:49,386
OK, cool.
745
00:44:49,512 --> 00:44:51,181
Well, thanks for the lift.
746
00:44:51,973 --> 00:44:56,479
And I'm sorry that I, you know,
shouted and stuff.
747
00:44:56,604 --> 00:44:58,190
Did you shout?
748
00:44:59,733 --> 00:45:01,736
A bit, yeah.
749
00:45:01,861 --> 00:45:03,571
Ah.
750
00:45:04,739 --> 00:45:07,701
- Anyway, thanks.
- [Eric] Yeah.
751
00:45:09,037 --> 00:45:11,957
Yeah, I'll be seeing youse.
752
00:45:12,082 --> 00:45:15,086
- Yeah, cheers.
- Cheers.
753
00:45:15,628 --> 00:45:16,630
Cheers.
754
00:45:16,755 --> 00:45:20,718
Yeah, youse take care
of yourselves now, eh.
755
00:45:20,844 --> 00:45:22,887
We will.
756
00:45:25,141 --> 00:45:26,642
Cheers.
757
00:45:26,767 --> 00:45:30,438
Yeah, I'll be heading off now
anyway, so...
758
00:45:30,564 --> 00:45:32,733
Man.
759
00:45:32,859 --> 00:45:34,735
OK.
760
00:45:34,861 --> 00:45:37,072
- Bye.
- Bye.
761
00:45:39,909 --> 00:45:41,995
Did you say something?
762
00:45:44,206 --> 00:45:46,750
- No.
- No?
763
00:45:49,045 --> 00:45:51,340
- You can go now.
- Okie-dokie.
764
00:45:52,800 --> 00:45:54,093
[starts engine]
765
00:45:54,218 --> 00:45:55,929
[Eric] Cheers.
766
00:45:56,054 --> 00:45:57,556
[humming]
767
00:46:00,643 --> 00:46:04,356
"If unattended,
please ring bell."
768
00:46:04,481 --> 00:46:06,233
Well go on, press it.
769
00:46:06,358 --> 00:46:07,861
Press it.
770
00:46:08,612 --> 00:46:10,323
There.
771
00:46:12,033 --> 00:46:13,451
[doorbell rings]
772
00:46:13,576 --> 00:46:14,578
Good one.
773
00:46:16,830 --> 00:46:19,083
I'll be fucked.
774
00:46:20,251 --> 00:46:22,630
[sighs]
775
00:46:22,755 --> 00:46:25,633
- Yes?
- Hi there, Officer.
776
00:46:25,759 --> 00:46:27,135
This is a bit of an odd one.
777
00:46:27,260 --> 00:46:29,972
We're trying to find a guy
we think might live in the area.
778
00:46:30,097 --> 00:46:32,977
We've got his number plate. We were
hoping you could give us his address.
779
00:46:33,435 --> 00:46:35,520
Yeah, definitely.
780
00:46:36,438 --> 00:46:37,607
-Oh. Brilliant
-Great.
781
00:46:37,732 --> 00:46:40,693
No, I'm always giving out people's
addresses to random strangers.
782
00:46:42,279 --> 00:46:44,823
- Really?
- Yeah, all day long.
783
00:46:46,701 --> 00:46:48,036
Are you being sarcastic?
784
00:46:48,161 --> 00:46:50,539
No, I'm not being sarcastic.
Why would I be sarcastic?
785
00:46:51,916 --> 00:46:53,210
Well, it's really important.
786
00:46:53,961 --> 00:46:56,213
Is it? Why?
787
00:46:56,338 --> 00:46:58,675
- Because he's got something of ours.
- What's he got?
788
00:46:59,550 --> 00:47:02,429
- It's a box.
- A box? What's it look like?
789
00:47:02,930 --> 00:47:07,269
- A penis, a gold penis.
- A penis?
790
00:47:07,852 --> 00:47:09,230
It's gold, a gold penis.
791
00:47:09,897 --> 00:47:11,274
Right.
792
00:47:12,526 --> 00:47:15,947
Anything in this
penis-shaped box,
793
00:47:16,072 --> 00:47:19,284
or is it just an empty
penis-shaped box?
794
00:47:19,410 --> 00:47:21,370
Oh, yeah,
there's something in it.
795
00:47:21,495 --> 00:47:22,705
What?
796
00:47:23,498 --> 00:47:25,792
It's our friend.
797
00:47:25,917 --> 00:47:28,504
Your friend is
in a penis-shaped box?
798
00:47:28,629 --> 00:47:30,256
Gold penis.
799
00:47:30,924 --> 00:47:32,718
What is this, a joke?
800
00:47:32,843 --> 00:47:36,222
This isn't a joke.
This is absolutely serious.
801
00:47:36,347 --> 00:47:37,598
Our friend died.
802
00:47:37,724 --> 00:47:40,019
We were taking him back home
and our plane crash-landed
803
00:47:40,144 --> 00:47:42,264
and now someone's taken him off
in a penis-shaped box.
804
00:47:42,288 --> 00:47:43,707
- [Tom] Yep.
- Gone.
805
00:47:48,112 --> 00:47:51,033
You know wasting police time
is a criminal offence, don't ya?
806
00:47:56,664 --> 00:47:58,292
Dickheads.
807
00:47:58,417 --> 00:48:00,169
Huh?
808
00:48:01,503 --> 00:48:04,049
[door slams shut]
809
00:48:04,174 --> 00:48:07,678
- Well, is she coming back or what?
- It's unclear, isn't it?
810
00:48:18,025 --> 00:48:19,985
She's just sitting there
with her feet up.
811
00:48:20,110 --> 00:48:22,822
Oh, for fuck's sake!
What's going on in this place?
812
00:48:22,947 --> 00:48:26,494
- How are we gonna find Mungus now?
- I know Mungus.
813
00:48:27,328 --> 00:48:28,705
You do?
814
00:48:28,830 --> 00:48:31,375
Know where he lives, too.
I can take you there if you like.
815
00:48:31,500 --> 00:48:33,961
That'd be fucking fantastic, thank you!
816
00:48:34,087 --> 00:48:36,423
No problem, get in the Kombi.
817
00:48:40,553 --> 00:48:43,765
David, you lump of shit.
818
00:48:44,892 --> 00:48:46,769
It's Henry.
819
00:48:46,894 --> 00:48:49,898
I'm in Abu Dhabi,
on the way to Perth
820
00:48:50,023 --> 00:48:53,152
to make sure you don't
screw up getting Luke back.
821
00:48:53,277 --> 00:48:55,781
I'll be there tomorrow morning.
822
00:48:55,906 --> 00:48:58,033
Here's what I want you to do.
823
00:48:58,158 --> 00:49:01,121
♪ Ooh, la, la, la, la, la ♪
824
00:49:01,246 --> 00:49:02,580
♪ Yeah ♪
825
00:49:02,705 --> 00:49:05,126
♪ Ooh, la, la, la, la, la ♪
826
00:49:07,045 --> 00:49:08,547
Thanks for driving us here.
827
00:49:08,672 --> 00:49:10,842
- Really grateful.
- No worries.
828
00:49:10,967 --> 00:49:13,207
So, what were you doing
at the police station earlier on?
829
00:49:13,231 --> 00:49:14,554
I got done for assault.
830
00:49:14,680 --> 00:49:16,306
Oh.
831
00:49:17,641 --> 00:49:19,477
You're cute.
832
00:49:19,602 --> 00:49:21,062
Am I? Thanks.
833
00:49:21,187 --> 00:49:23,774
I don't usually go for English blokes
'cause they're all gay,
834
00:49:23,899 --> 00:49:26,528
but I'd consider doing you.
835
00:49:26,653 --> 00:49:28,155
[laughs]
836
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:29,739
- Really?
- Yeah.
837
00:49:29,865 --> 00:49:30,908
Thanks.
838
00:49:32,243 --> 00:49:34,538
You like Australian women?
839
00:49:34,663 --> 00:49:36,790
Oh, yeah, sure.
Do you know any?
840
00:49:42,029 --> 00:49:44,109
- What the fuck does that mean?
- [Graham] I'm sorry.
841
00:49:44,133 --> 00:49:46,136
- It was meant to be a joke.
- Why have we stopped?
842
00:49:46,261 --> 00:49:47,941
Because you're all fucking off,
that's why.
843
00:49:48,054 --> 00:49:50,535
- What have you done now?
- Well, I didn't mean anything by it.
844
00:49:50,559 --> 00:49:52,935
- What did you say?
- Oh go on, tell him.
845
00:49:53,061 --> 00:49:55,647
Well, Maureen asked
if I liked Australian women,
846
00:49:55,772 --> 00:49:58,193
and I said,
"Why, do you know any?"
847
00:49:58,318 --> 00:50:01,947
- Oh, you wanker!
- Well, Maureen, come back.
848
00:50:04,116 --> 00:50:07,037
- Jesus, Graham.
- What? I didn't think it was that bad.
849
00:50:11,751 --> 00:50:13,420
Utter penis.
850
00:50:13,545 --> 00:50:14,546
Ow!
851
00:50:20,971 --> 00:50:25,060
Maureen, I'd just like to apologize
on behalf of my friend. He's an idiot.
852
00:50:25,185 --> 00:50:27,395
- Yes, he is, a total idiot.
- I know.
853
00:50:27,521 --> 00:50:30,316
A total fucking idiot!
854
00:50:32,402 --> 00:50:35,907
Anyway, I know you're upset,
855
00:50:36,032 --> 00:50:39,161
but do you think it would be OK for you
to please take us to Mungus's place?
856
00:50:39,286 --> 00:50:42,498
Well, I don't know now. I feel like
I'm having the piss taken out of me.
857
00:50:42,623 --> 00:50:44,064
No-one's taking the piss out of you.
858
00:50:44,088 --> 00:50:48,427
You think because I'm not 25 years old,
I'm not a sexual being, don't you?
859
00:50:49,757 --> 00:50:53,345
- No, I don't think that at all.
- Well, he fucking does!
860
00:51:00,354 --> 00:51:02,566
- Hi, guys.
- What's going on?
861
00:51:02,691 --> 00:51:04,818
So, here's the deal.
862
00:51:04,943 --> 00:51:08,239
Maureen's agreed to take us
to Mungus's, but on one condition.
863
00:51:08,364 --> 00:51:09,908
What's the condition?
864
00:51:10,033 --> 00:51:11,785
She, um...
865
00:51:12,744 --> 00:51:14,539
- She...
- Well, come on David, spit it out.
866
00:51:14,664 --> 00:51:16,791
- She wants to have sex.
- Eurgh!
867
00:51:16,916 --> 00:51:18,502
- She wants to have sex.
- Who with?
868
00:51:18,627 --> 00:51:20,254
- With Graham.
- What?
869
00:51:20,379 --> 00:51:22,799
- Is she fucking joking?
- She's definitely not joking.
870
00:51:22,924 --> 00:51:25,605
She says you insulted her, so now
she feels the need to prove to you
871
00:51:25,629 --> 00:51:27,989
that she's the best lover
in the whole of Western Australia.
872
00:51:28,038 --> 00:51:29,373
- Fair enough.
- I believe her.
873
00:51:29,498 --> 00:51:31,685
It's not enough,
she wants to prove it.
874
00:51:33,813 --> 00:51:36,566
But she's too old. She looks
like my gran, for fuck's sake.
875
00:51:36,692 --> 00:51:38,110
- Which gran?
- Granny Charlotte.
876
00:51:38,235 --> 00:51:40,835
- Oh yeah, she does a bit.
- OK, but she's not actually your gran.
877
00:51:40,859 --> 00:51:43,408
- Does look a lot like her though.
- Tom, will you shut up?
878
00:51:43,533 --> 00:51:45,703
As I was saying,
she's not actually your gran.
879
00:51:45,828 --> 00:51:47,288
And the fact is, if you don't do it,
880
00:51:47,413 --> 00:51:49,614
we're gonna end up stranded
in the middle of fucksville,
881
00:51:49,638 --> 00:51:51,668
with a very good chance
we'll lose Luke forever.
882
00:51:51,793 --> 00:51:54,213
Well, is there any wiggle room
for negotiation?
883
00:51:54,339 --> 00:51:56,592
- Maybe she'll accept a fingering?
- Oh, Tom.
884
00:51:56,717 --> 00:51:58,344
She was very clear.
885
00:51:58,469 --> 00:52:02,557
- It's got to be full-blown intercourse.
- Oh, for fuck's sake! You do it, David.
886
00:52:02,682 --> 00:52:05,353
- I can't do it, I'm married.
- Who gives a shit if you're married?
887
00:52:05,478 --> 00:52:06,872
I don't know if you've
heard of this concept,
888
00:52:06,896 --> 00:52:09,137
but married people aren't
supposed to go shagging around.
889
00:52:09,161 --> 00:52:10,441
It's not shagging around, is it?
890
00:52:10,525 --> 00:52:12,612
It's shagging one person
for a very specific reason
891
00:52:12,737 --> 00:52:14,256
and these are very
mitigating circumstances.
892
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:15,675
I'm not sure Mia's
going to see it like that.
893
00:52:15,699 --> 00:52:17,510
Anyway, you're single,
you won't be cheating on anyone.
894
00:52:17,534 --> 00:52:19,655
- What, Tom's single.
- Yeah, but she doesn't want me.
895
00:52:19,682 --> 00:52:21,682
She wants you.
She asked for you very specifically.
896
00:52:21,706 --> 00:52:24,587
Maybe if you offered yourself to her.
I mean, come on, this is your area.
897
00:52:24,710 --> 00:52:27,231
- What, shagging old women?
- Yeah, you're always experimenting.
898
00:52:27,297 --> 00:52:29,697
No, I've never done anything like this.
This is fucking nuts.
899
00:52:29,721 --> 00:52:32,683
Hey, hurry up,
or I'm taking off!
900
00:52:33,137 --> 00:52:35,015
Won't be a minute.
901
00:52:35,140 --> 00:52:36,642
Aw, she's horrible.
902
00:52:36,767 --> 00:52:38,978
Alright, thumbs up, thumbs down.
903
00:52:39,104 --> 00:52:40,814
- No Graham.
- No Graham.
904
00:52:40,939 --> 00:52:43,401
But look, I can't physically do it.
Don't you understand that?
905
00:52:43,526 --> 00:52:44,694
What do you mean?
906
00:52:44,819 --> 00:52:47,460
Look there's something I've been
meaning to tell you for some time,
907
00:52:47,484 --> 00:52:51,823
and I'm sorry it's taken me this long
to tell you, but... I'm a gay.
908
00:52:52,537 --> 00:52:54,373
You're gay?
909
00:52:54,498 --> 00:52:58,086
And it would be a total betrayal
of myself to my sexuality.
910
00:52:58,211 --> 00:53:01,089
I just can't do it to my gay brothers
and sisters. They'd be livid.
911
00:53:01,215 --> 00:53:02,633
Nice try, Graham.
912
00:53:02,758 --> 00:53:05,345
Look, I'm not bullshitting you.
I really am a gay!
913
00:53:05,470 --> 00:53:08,682
I've known you for 30 years. You're not
gay, you're just trying to get out of it.
914
00:53:08,808 --> 00:53:10,601
Alright, alright, I'm not gay,
915
00:53:10,727 --> 00:53:13,021
but please, please David,
please don't make me do it.
916
00:53:13,147 --> 00:53:15,357
Graham, look,
917
00:53:15,482 --> 00:53:17,277
our friend's dead.
918
00:53:17,402 --> 00:53:19,195
His body is out there somewhere,
919
00:53:19,320 --> 00:53:22,121
and our only chance of getting him
back home to his aunt and mad cousin
920
00:53:22,145 --> 00:53:24,202
is if you go and shag
that old lady over there.
921
00:53:24,327 --> 00:53:27,289
- Now, come on, man.
- Yeah, come on, man.
922
00:53:27,414 --> 00:53:28,875
Do it for Luke.
923
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:31,127
[gagging]
924
00:53:31,252 --> 00:53:33,213
[grunting]
925
00:53:35,466 --> 00:53:37,969
[Maureen] Whoo,
do I turn you on, Grah?
926
00:53:38,094 --> 00:53:40,097
- Yeah.
- Do you want me to help you?
927
00:53:40,222 --> 00:53:42,582
No, it's alright, Maureen.
I know what I'm doing, it's fine.
928
00:53:42,683 --> 00:53:46,521
- Now give us a snog, I'm not a hooker.
- OK, I just...
929
00:53:46,646 --> 00:53:48,691
[groaning]
930
00:53:51,612 --> 00:53:53,655
Oh, Maureen, ah.
931
00:53:53,781 --> 00:53:55,867
- Oh. [giggling]
- Ah.
932
00:53:55,992 --> 00:53:58,203
See, I knew you could do it.
933
00:53:58,328 --> 00:54:00,372
Alright.
934
00:54:00,498 --> 00:54:02,667
Just... oh, oh.
935
00:54:02,793 --> 00:54:03,794
[groaning]
936
00:54:03,919 --> 00:54:07,131
- Shall we move a bit further away?
- Huh?
937
00:54:07,256 --> 00:54:09,217
[grunting]
938
00:54:11,845 --> 00:54:13,725
- Let's, yeah.
- [David] Fuck, that's different.
939
00:54:13,749 --> 00:54:16,100
- Tom.
- Yeah.
940
00:54:16,226 --> 00:54:17,852
[groaning]
941
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:22,859
[laughing]
942
00:54:23,485 --> 00:54:26,781
[Graham] I'm a naughty boy,
Maureen. I'm an animal.
943
00:54:26,906 --> 00:54:31,078
Uh! Oh, God. I'm going again.
I'm going again.
944
00:54:31,203 --> 00:54:33,331
Oh! Ooh, it's nice.
945
00:54:33,456 --> 00:54:36,084
Ooh, woman nipples.
946
00:54:36,209 --> 00:54:38,671
[groaning]
947
00:54:38,796 --> 00:54:40,381
[Maureen giggling]
948
00:54:40,506 --> 00:54:42,133
[Graham] Careful, don't snap it.
949
00:54:51,186 --> 00:54:53,189
- Jesus, are you OK?
- Yeah.
950
00:54:53,314 --> 00:54:55,441
You've been in there fucking ages.
951
00:54:58,988 --> 00:55:01,700
Yeah, yeah, I'm good.
952
00:55:01,959 --> 00:55:04,462
Fucking hell,
you actually enjoyed it, didn't you?
953
00:55:04,587 --> 00:55:06,423
Why, what was so good about it?
954
00:55:06,548 --> 00:55:09,051
- What did she do?
- [laughs]
955
00:55:09,176 --> 00:55:13,056
- Oh, a gentleman never tells.
- What?
956
00:55:14,641 --> 00:55:16,122
[Graham] That woman is very creative.
957
00:55:16,146 --> 00:55:18,396
I am as empty
as an empty shower pump.
958
00:55:18,521 --> 00:55:19,523
What?
959
00:55:19,648 --> 00:55:22,276
♪ Oh, la, la, la, la, la ♪
960
00:55:23,987 --> 00:55:27,241
? Oh, la, la, la, la, la?
- Oh, I'm alright, thanks.
961
00:55:33,331 --> 00:55:34,792
Well, here we are.
962
00:55:34,917 --> 00:55:37,587
Mungus lives right in there,
so out you get.
963
00:55:37,712 --> 00:55:38,756
Ah, brilliant.
964
00:55:38,881 --> 00:55:41,341
Thanks Maureen, you're a star.
965
00:55:44,679 --> 00:55:48,768
Hey, er, listen, maybe we could grab
a drink or something while I'm in town.
966
00:55:48,893 --> 00:55:51,063
I don't think so, mate.
967
00:55:51,188 --> 00:55:53,774
Right...
Right, fair enough.
968
00:55:55,109 --> 00:55:58,739
So um, Maureen, are you
on Facebook or anything?
969
00:55:58,864 --> 00:55:59,865
Why?
970
00:55:59,990 --> 00:56:03,286
Well I thought maybe we could,
you know, keep in touch.
971
00:56:03,411 --> 00:56:06,415
Look, son, this was
a one-off deal, hmm?
972
00:56:07,249 --> 00:56:09,461
Right, understood.
973
00:56:10,504 --> 00:56:12,964
You could follow me
on Twitter if you like.
974
00:56:14,300 --> 00:56:15,301
Yeah?
975
00:56:15,426 --> 00:56:18,097
MaureenB1939.
976
00:56:18,222 --> 00:56:20,975
No direct messaging though.
977
00:56:22,018 --> 00:56:24,145
MaureenB1939.
978
00:56:24,270 --> 00:56:25,689
[Maureen] Mm.
979
00:56:32,490 --> 00:56:33,908
[birds chirping]
980
00:56:35,785 --> 00:56:37,788
Fuck off.
981
00:56:37,913 --> 00:56:39,832
Probably a bit louder.
982
00:56:39,958 --> 00:56:41,459
[fly buzzing]
983
00:56:46,757 --> 00:56:48,009
Oh, for fuck's sake.
984
00:56:48,135 --> 00:56:50,637
- [Graham] Shh!
- [Mungus] Hello?
985
00:56:52,890 --> 00:56:54,725
- Hi there.
- Is that Mungus?
986
00:56:54,851 --> 00:56:56,353
No.
987
00:56:56,478 --> 00:56:58,480
Yes, who's there?
988
00:57:00,150 --> 00:57:02,527
We're sorry to disturb you.
989
00:57:02,652 --> 00:57:04,733
We think you might have something
that belongs to us.
990
00:57:07,325 --> 00:57:08,743
- It's our friend.
- Shut up!
991
00:57:08,869 --> 00:57:11,497
- Can you just let me deal with this?
- Alright.
992
00:57:12,165 --> 00:57:14,041
[multiple locks unlocking]
993
00:57:19,549 --> 00:57:20,758
G'day.
994
00:57:21,426 --> 00:57:23,053
You're Mungus, yeah?
995
00:57:23,179 --> 00:57:25,681
Yeah, George Mungus.
How can I help you?
996
00:57:25,806 --> 00:57:28,852
We put something in your truck
by mistake
997
00:57:28,977 --> 00:57:30,498
when you were
at the roadhouse earlier.
998
00:57:31,189 --> 00:57:33,274
In my truck?
What did you put in my truck?
999
00:57:33,399 --> 00:57:36,320
- Ah well, It's a box.
- Looks like a penis.
1000
00:57:36,445 --> 00:57:38,990
Do you mind if we
just take a quick look?
1001
00:57:39,115 --> 00:57:41,159
I know it sounds a bit weird.
1002
00:57:41,284 --> 00:57:44,038
Do you mind if we take a look,
see if it's still there?
1003
00:57:47,000 --> 00:57:49,545
Yeah, sure.
The truck's just round the back.
1004
00:57:53,800 --> 00:57:56,178
- He's there.
- Wow!
1005
00:57:56,303 --> 00:57:57,514
[laughs]
1006
00:57:57,639 --> 00:57:59,557
I did not even know
that was there.
1007
00:57:59,682 --> 00:58:01,560
We put it in there by accident,
I'm so sorry.
1008
00:58:01,685 --> 00:58:03,812
Ah, no worries.
1009
00:58:03,938 --> 00:58:06,316
- So how did you blokes find me?
- Maureen.
1010
00:58:07,275 --> 00:58:11,030
- She's a special lady, that Maureen.
- Yeah, she is.
1011
00:58:13,742 --> 00:58:16,621
So, I don't suppose
we could make a call,
1012
00:58:16,746 --> 00:58:18,122
sort out some transport?
1013
00:58:18,248 --> 00:58:19,917
Yeah, of course you can.
1014
00:58:20,584 --> 00:58:22,795
- Come on inside.
- Amazing, thanks.
1015
00:58:22,920 --> 00:58:24,756
No worries.
1016
00:58:27,217 --> 00:58:30,018
I got to be honest, I don't think
I'll be telling the boys down the pub
1017
00:58:30,042 --> 00:58:32,963
that I've been carting around
a massive steel penis.
1018
00:58:33,767 --> 00:58:35,528
So do you guys want a cup of tea
or anything?
1019
00:58:35,603 --> 00:58:36,963
Ah, fuck yeah,
that would be great.
1020
00:58:36,987 --> 00:58:39,316
Er... can I just ask you guys
a small favor though?
1021
00:58:39,441 --> 00:58:41,026
Sure, what is it?
1022
00:58:41,151 --> 00:58:43,738
Can I introduce you to my mother?
I know she'd love to meet you.
1023
00:58:46,157 --> 00:58:49,745
- Yeah, sure, why not?
- Great. I'll, er... I'll go get her then.
1024
00:58:49,870 --> 00:58:51,999
The living room's
just around the corner there.
1025
00:58:54,711 --> 00:58:56,546
- Hands off her, Graham.
- Shut up.
1026
00:58:56,671 --> 00:58:58,340
[laughing]
1027
00:59:00,551 --> 00:59:02,721
Right, where's this old biddy then?
1028
00:59:03,305 --> 00:59:04,723
Don't know.
1029
00:59:04,848 --> 00:59:06,851
Still, Mungus seems
a decent bloke at least.
1030
00:59:06,976 --> 00:59:08,394
I know.
1031
00:59:08,519 --> 00:59:11,898
Nice to finally meet someone
in this place who isn't mental.
1032
00:59:12,816 --> 00:59:14,777
Hello.
1033
00:59:14,902 --> 00:59:17,071
Oh, you are fucking kidding me.
1034
00:59:18,490 --> 00:59:20,284
That's Mungus, isn't it?
1035
00:59:20,409 --> 00:59:21,745
I'm afraid so.
1036
00:59:22,537 --> 00:59:26,042
It is such a pleasure
to meet you boys.
1037
00:59:26,167 --> 00:59:28,753
George has told me
all about you.
1038
00:59:28,879 --> 00:59:31,006
Oh, I'm sorry,
where are my manners?
1039
00:59:31,131 --> 00:59:32,299
I'm Mother.
1040
00:59:32,424 --> 00:59:35,219
Now I want to make yourselves
as comfortable as...
1041
00:59:35,345 --> 00:59:38,057
- We, er... really need to be going.
- Too fucking right.
1042
00:59:38,807 --> 00:59:40,059
Oh, there it is.
1043
00:59:41,728 --> 00:59:44,523
- I've been looking for that.
- Oh, I don't like this.
1044
00:59:44,649 --> 00:59:46,859
- For the cake.
- OK, look...
1045
00:59:46,984 --> 00:59:49,613
- We just want to take our friend and go.
- Your friend?
1046
00:59:50,364 --> 00:59:53,076
Oh, you mean the young lady
that was in the box?
1047
00:59:53,201 --> 00:59:55,411
- What do you mean, "lady"?
- What do you mean, "was"?
1048
00:59:55,536 --> 00:59:57,331
Well, I've moved her
into the bedroom.
1049
00:59:57,456 --> 00:59:59,542
[creaking]
1050
01:00:04,965 --> 01:00:06,634
Isn't she lovely?
1051
01:00:11,432 --> 01:00:13,518
Hello, sweetheart.
1052
01:00:14,769 --> 01:00:17,606
So, tea and cake
for everyone, yes?
1053
01:00:18,691 --> 01:00:20,151
Good.
1054
01:00:20,276 --> 01:00:22,905
Now, you guys go and get dressed,
1055
01:00:23,030 --> 01:00:25,282
and I'll see you out there
in a minute.
1056
01:00:26,367 --> 01:00:28,995
- [Tom] Get dressed?
- Well, yes.
1057
01:00:29,121 --> 01:00:31,624
You have to get dressed
for the tea party.
1058
01:00:32,583 --> 01:00:35,921
Everything you need is in there.
1059
01:00:36,839 --> 01:00:38,633
- In there?
- Yeah.
1060
01:00:38,758 --> 01:00:40,385
In you go.
1061
01:00:49,146 --> 01:00:50,356
[lock clicks]
1062
01:00:50,481 --> 01:00:53,902
- [Graham] What the fuck is going on?
- That bloke is fucking nuts.
1063
01:00:54,027 --> 01:00:57,449
Yeah, but he's not just nuts though.
He's a fucking psychopath.
1064
01:00:57,574 --> 01:01:00,326
- He's gonna kill us and wear our skin.
- No, he's not, Graham.
1065
01:01:00,452 --> 01:01:01,829
How do you fucking know?
1066
01:01:01,954 --> 01:01:04,790
Because we're gonna keep calm,
and do what he asks,
1067
01:01:04,916 --> 01:01:07,335
- and we're gonna find a way out.
- Do what he asks?
1068
01:01:07,461 --> 01:01:09,589
What, dress up as trannies?
1069
01:01:10,631 --> 01:01:12,760
No fucking way.
I'm not dressing up like a tranny.
1070
01:01:12,885 --> 01:01:14,725
- That's page one, David.
- Stop saying tranny.
1071
01:01:14,749 --> 01:01:16,389
- Tranny, tranny.
- He's not a tranny.
1072
01:01:16,514 --> 01:01:18,634
- Tranny, tranny, tranny, tranny.
- He's not a tranny.
1073
01:01:18,658 --> 01:01:20,811
- Am I offending you, David?
- Yes, you are.
1074
01:01:20,936 --> 01:01:23,248
I don't give a shit that he wears a dress
and thinks he's his mother.
1075
01:01:23,272 --> 01:01:25,293
I give a shit that he's in there
with a fifteen-inch machete
1076
01:01:25,317 --> 01:01:26,919
and there's every indication
that he's mad enough to use it.
1077
01:01:26,943 --> 01:01:29,280
You two do what you want to do.
I'm making a run for it.
1078
01:01:29,405 --> 01:01:32,284
But she's out there.
She might kill us if we run.
1079
01:01:32,409 --> 01:01:35,037
Well, I'll take my chances.
It's every man for himself.
1080
01:01:35,162 --> 01:01:36,483
Tom, just be rational about this.
1081
01:01:36,581 --> 01:01:40,085
If that means having a dress-ups
tea party with Norman fucking Bates,
1082
01:01:40,211 --> 01:01:41,879
then I'd rather not be rational, thanks.
1083
01:01:42,004 --> 01:01:45,133
I'm not gonna die now, especially when
I didn't even get my fucking threesome!
1084
01:01:45,258 --> 01:01:47,386
We're going to die.
1085
01:01:50,389 --> 01:01:51,892
Oh, I think he shat himself again.
1086
01:01:52,559 --> 01:01:54,603
Oh for fuck's sake, have you?
1087
01:01:56,231 --> 01:01:57,774
You got a real problem,
you know that?
1088
01:02:00,444 --> 01:02:02,238
OK, fine.
1089
01:02:03,281 --> 01:02:05,033
So, what's your master plan then?
1090
01:02:05,158 --> 01:02:07,328
[upbeat music]
1091
01:02:08,871 --> 01:02:11,333
Well, this is great, isn't it?
1092
01:02:11,458 --> 01:02:12,584
Yeah.
1093
01:02:12,709 --> 01:02:16,464
What's wrong with your friend?
He seems a bit uncomfortable.
1094
01:02:16,589 --> 01:02:19,760
- He shat himself.
- Oh, I see. Mmh.
1095
01:02:21,428 --> 01:02:25,016
Mmh. Well... anyone for cake?
1096
01:02:26,561 --> 01:02:28,229
[screaming]
1097
01:02:28,688 --> 01:02:30,440
No?
1098
01:02:30,566 --> 01:02:32,943
Well, in that case
1099
01:02:33,068 --> 01:02:36,489
I would like
to make a quick toast
1100
01:02:36,614 --> 01:02:39,118
to thank you all for coming.
1101
01:02:39,243 --> 01:02:41,079
I get a bit lonely here sometimes,
1102
01:02:41,204 --> 01:02:47,044
which is why I'm so happy to have met
you wonderful English ladies,
1103
01:02:47,169 --> 01:02:50,132
and I would love it
if we could all stay together
1104
01:02:50,257 --> 01:02:53,094
for a very long time indeed.
1105
01:02:53,219 --> 01:02:55,221
Basically, forever really.
1106
01:02:55,346 --> 01:02:57,516
Cheers, everyone.
1107
01:02:57,641 --> 01:02:58,934
Everyone.
1108
01:02:59,059 --> 01:03:00,645
[clanking]
1109
01:03:00,770 --> 01:03:01,855
Cheers.
1110
01:03:01,980 --> 01:03:03,648
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
1111
01:03:04,191 --> 01:03:06,819
Now, who would like Lamingtons?
1112
01:03:08,363 --> 01:03:09,740
Yes?
1113
01:03:09,865 --> 01:03:11,701
Right. Hmm.
1114
01:03:15,497 --> 01:03:17,958
Did you hear him say forever?
That means dead.
1115
01:03:18,083 --> 01:03:19,711
Right, can I make a strong suggestion
1116
01:03:19,836 --> 01:03:23,424
that we leave now before
he chops us up into little pieces?
1117
01:03:25,009 --> 01:03:26,594
- OK, let's go.
- Come on.
1118
01:03:27,638 --> 01:03:28,805
[groans]
1119
01:03:28,931 --> 01:03:30,491
[Tom] Are you fucking joking?
Leave him!
1120
01:03:30,515 --> 01:03:32,226
We're not leaving him,
just grab him.
1121
01:03:33,603 --> 01:03:35,439
It's locked.
1122
01:03:35,564 --> 01:03:37,399
Shit.
1123
01:03:37,524 --> 01:03:38,693
Check the windows.
1124
01:03:47,537 --> 01:03:49,665
- The windows are nailed shut.
- Fuck's sake.
1125
01:03:49,790 --> 01:03:53,711
- There's got to be a key somewhere.
- [Mother] Here come the Lamingtons.
1126
01:03:55,214 --> 01:03:56,590
- Stall her!
- How?
1127
01:03:56,715 --> 01:03:58,259
- Just do it.
- Just do it.
1128
01:03:58,385 --> 01:03:59,636
Go!
1129
01:04:00,387 --> 01:04:02,890
- OK, help me find the key.
- Right.
1130
01:04:07,187 --> 01:04:08,438
How's it going?
1131
01:04:08,563 --> 01:04:09,941
Yes, good.
1132
01:04:10,066 --> 01:04:12,860
- You're going to love these.
- Yeah, I bet.
1133
01:04:12,987 --> 01:04:14,405
They look yummy.
1134
01:04:14,530 --> 01:04:16,448
Well they are, yes.
1135
01:04:17,534 --> 01:04:22,498
Um... I just... well,
who made your dress?
1136
01:04:22,623 --> 01:04:25,168
It fits you really snugly.
1137
01:04:26,420 --> 01:04:28,171
Oh, thank you, Tom.
1138
01:04:28,297 --> 01:04:31,009
- I actually made the dress myself.
- No way.
1139
01:04:31,134 --> 01:04:32,177
Yes, way.
1140
01:04:32,302 --> 01:04:33,345
[banging]
1141
01:04:33,470 --> 01:04:35,431
- Shh.
- Alright.
1142
01:04:35,556 --> 01:04:38,268
How many vaginas
do you think a wombat has?
1143
01:04:38,393 --> 01:04:40,312
Well I would think
just the one, Tom.
1144
01:04:40,438 --> 01:04:42,064
No, it's two.
1145
01:04:42,189 --> 01:04:45,110
Well, hmm!
That's a lot of vaginas.
1146
01:04:45,235 --> 01:04:47,676
Yes, and did you know
Australia has the world's longest fence?
1147
01:04:48,322 --> 01:04:50,074
I got them, I got them, I got them!
1148
01:04:52,411 --> 01:04:55,290
Just one more thing.
1149
01:04:55,915 --> 01:04:56,916
Yes, Tom?
1150
01:04:57,042 --> 01:04:59,336
- [Graham] No.
- [David] Give it to me.
1151
01:04:59,462 --> 01:05:00,880
What?
1152
01:05:03,842 --> 01:05:05,844
[Graham] I've got them in order,
David, alright?
1153
01:05:10,684 --> 01:05:11,685
Yes, yes!
1154
01:05:12,728 --> 01:05:16,733
Ah... you're barking
up the wrong tree there, mate.
1155
01:05:16,858 --> 01:05:18,109
We're out!
1156
01:05:18,235 --> 01:05:20,321
[screams]
1157
01:05:20,446 --> 01:05:22,991
[screaming] Leg it!
1158
01:05:23,116 --> 01:05:25,494
[Graham] Run for your life, run!
1159
01:05:25,619 --> 01:05:27,663
Tom, help us!
1160
01:05:29,373 --> 01:05:31,668
- No, no, no, no.
- No.
1161
01:05:31,794 --> 01:05:34,005
[screaming]
1162
01:05:38,719 --> 01:05:40,805
- [gunshot]
- Oi, Mungus!
1163
01:05:40,930 --> 01:05:43,475
What are you doing,
you dopey cunt?
1164
01:05:43,600 --> 01:05:45,018
But they're taking her.
1165
01:05:45,144 --> 01:05:47,897
What the fuck are you talking about?
That's their dead friend.
1166
01:05:48,022 --> 01:05:51,777
Now stop being so rude
and acting like a bloody maniac.
1167
01:05:53,279 --> 01:05:54,572
I wasn't gonna hurt anyone.
1168
01:05:54,697 --> 01:05:58,911
How do they know that when you're
running around with a fucking machete?
1169
01:06:04,544 --> 01:06:05,545
Sorry, guys.
1170
01:06:06,129 --> 01:06:11,009
Now, you go back inside
and have a lie down.
1171
01:06:17,017 --> 01:06:20,856
He's alright, he just gets
a bit funny sometimes.
1172
01:06:20,981 --> 01:06:22,649
Oh!
1173
01:06:22,774 --> 01:06:25,528
You go and get your clothes
and I'll take you to Perth.
1174
01:06:30,951 --> 01:06:32,370
♪ Come on tell me ♪
1175
01:06:33,788 --> 01:06:35,875
♪ If you know where she is at ♪
1176
01:06:36,000 --> 01:06:37,918
♪ How could I see ♪
1177
01:06:38,837 --> 01:06:41,256
♪ Honey dear ♪
1178
01:06:41,381 --> 01:06:43,259
♪ Can't you hear me calling you ♪
1179
01:06:43,384 --> 01:06:45,428
♪ I'll soon be there ♪
1180
01:06:45,553 --> 01:06:47,431
How come you're still
wearing that dress?
1181
01:06:48,307 --> 01:06:49,808
I shat in my trousers, Maureen.
1182
01:06:49,933 --> 01:06:55,065
Ooh! One thing I learned getting old,
I never trust a fart.
1183
01:06:57,443 --> 01:06:59,829
At last I've got reception.
1184
01:07:03,470 --> 01:07:06,558
- [Henry] David!
- Oh shit, it's Henry.
1185
01:07:06,683 --> 01:07:08,268
I'm on my way to Perth.
1186
01:07:08,393 --> 01:07:10,438
- He's coming to Perth!
- What? When?
1187
01:07:11,772 --> 01:07:14,985
He wants us to deliver Luke
to some funeral home by three o'clock.
1188
01:07:16,778 --> 01:07:17,780
Today.
1189
01:07:19,407 --> 01:07:22,870
♪ You're hiding
and you're gonna be found ♪
1190
01:07:24,246 --> 01:07:27,083
♪ I think you know
what's on my mind ♪
1191
01:07:27,208 --> 01:07:29,045
♪ You know what I want ♪
1192
01:07:44,439 --> 01:07:46,691
Grab his legs.
1193
01:07:47,902 --> 01:07:48,986
Gentle, gentle!
1194
01:07:49,111 --> 01:07:51,949
You totally saved us, Maureen.
I don't know how we can thank you.
1195
01:07:52,074 --> 01:07:54,409
That's alright.
You get your friend home.
1196
01:07:55,118 --> 01:07:57,664
OK, bye.
1197
01:08:00,834 --> 01:08:03,588
[moaning]
1198
01:08:13,850 --> 01:08:16,646
[Tom] Graham,
when you've finished...
1199
01:08:21,276 --> 01:08:23,655
[panting]
1200
01:08:30,414 --> 01:08:32,290
Graham!
1201
01:08:36,254 --> 01:08:39,091
Shit. Henry.
1202
01:08:39,216 --> 01:08:40,259
Henry's here!
1203
01:08:40,384 --> 01:08:41,636
- What?
- He's early.
1204
01:08:44,597 --> 01:08:46,118
- Quick, out of the way.
- What's that?
1205
01:08:46,183 --> 01:08:48,894
[Graham] It's OK, it's alright.
No need to panic.
1206
01:08:50,355 --> 01:08:53,276
- Never mind. No, it's OK.
- [woman] This is highly irregular.
1207
01:08:54,110 --> 01:08:55,361
Oi!
1208
01:08:59,199 --> 01:09:01,411
Open this door now.
1209
01:09:01,536 --> 01:09:02,746
Won't be a minute.
1210
01:09:04,039 --> 01:09:06,640
- [Tom] What is this stuff?
- [David] It's paint, just get it off.
1211
01:09:06,664 --> 01:09:08,207
[chattering]
1212
01:09:09,046 --> 01:09:10,130
David!
1213
01:09:10,255 --> 01:09:11,798
Oh, God. He's going
around the side.
1214
01:09:12,467 --> 01:09:14,260
I'm going to count to four.
1215
01:09:14,385 --> 01:09:15,386
One.
1216
01:09:15,511 --> 01:09:18,515
David! Have you forgotten
what I said, David?
1217
01:09:18,640 --> 01:09:21,978
Jesus, we're never gonna get
this paint off on time. On three.
1218
01:09:22,103 --> 01:09:23,563
- Three.
- Three.
1219
01:09:23,689 --> 01:09:26,043
Why didn't either of you remember
to do this when we were in the car?
1220
01:09:26,067 --> 01:09:29,188
- I didn't realize he was gonna be here.
- It's not like you remembered, David.
1221
01:09:29,279 --> 01:09:32,450
That's right, cos I have to remember
everything, as always. Thanks.
1222
01:09:32,575 --> 01:09:35,662
Being friends with you two is like being
a father to two massive idiot babies.
1223
01:09:35,788 --> 01:09:40,001
Tom, open the bloody door.
I'm not angry.
1224
01:09:40,126 --> 01:09:41,878
Everything always goes wrong.
1225
01:09:42,003 --> 01:09:44,124
Oh, I see. So it's all mine
and Graham's fault, is it?
1226
01:09:44,148 --> 01:09:47,803
No, but it would've been easier to deal
with if you weren't so out for yourself.
1227
01:09:47,928 --> 01:09:49,528
And if Graham didn't fuck everything up.
1228
01:09:49,554 --> 01:09:52,117
If Graham's a buffoon and I'm a selfish
prick, then why are we still friends?
1229
01:09:52,141 --> 01:09:53,810
That's a seriously good question.
1230
01:09:53,935 --> 01:09:55,687
You don't mean that, David.
1231
01:09:55,813 --> 01:09:57,481
Let's just say it crossed my mind.
1232
01:09:57,606 --> 01:10:00,026
Releasing the feeling
that I am angry.
1233
01:10:00,151 --> 01:10:01,736
Releasing the feeling
that I am angry.
1234
01:10:01,861 --> 01:10:04,240
Yeah, well you don't really
need us anymore, do you?
1235
01:10:04,365 --> 01:10:07,202
- Not since you married that bint.
- Tom.
1236
01:10:07,327 --> 01:10:08,328
What?
1237
01:10:09,121 --> 01:10:12,125
- Did you just call my wife a bint?
- [banging]
1238
01:10:12,250 --> 01:10:15,712
Ah... releasing the feeling,
excuse me, sir.
1239
01:10:15,838 --> 01:10:18,133
That's a lovely tie.
It's a nice color on your complexion.
1240
01:10:18,258 --> 01:10:19,818
Is there another way
into this building?
1241
01:10:21,303 --> 01:10:23,514
- We need somewhere to put Luke.
- In there.
1242
01:10:29,272 --> 01:10:31,482
There's a dead man in here.
1243
01:10:31,607 --> 01:10:33,152
Just swap them over.
1244
01:10:33,277 --> 01:10:35,112
[grunts]
1245
01:10:47,002 --> 01:10:50,173
What the fuck is going on?
1246
01:10:51,090 --> 01:10:52,718
Henry.
1247
01:10:53,552 --> 01:10:55,596
- Nothing.
- Nothing?
1248
01:10:58,308 --> 01:11:01,103
So, Henry, what made you
come to Perth?
1249
01:11:01,228 --> 01:11:03,481
Because I knew
I couldn't trust you fuckwits
1250
01:11:03,607 --> 01:11:05,692
to bring him back in one piece.
1251
01:11:05,817 --> 01:11:06,860
Here he is.
1252
01:11:23,465 --> 01:11:25,550
Why has he got a boner?
1253
01:11:27,053 --> 01:11:28,638
It just won't go down.
I'm really sorry.
1254
01:11:28,763 --> 01:11:31,016
- We did everything we...
- It's OK.
1255
01:11:32,017 --> 01:11:34,354
I'd like to go out with a boner.
1256
01:11:40,402 --> 01:11:42,530
His dick's been painted.
1257
01:11:43,782 --> 01:11:45,408
I don't want to know.
1258
01:11:47,578 --> 01:11:49,579
Do you think we can still make
the funeral on time?
1259
01:11:49,665 --> 01:11:51,833
We better fucking make it.
1260
01:11:51,959 --> 01:11:54,420
I've booked us
on the next flight to London.
1261
01:11:54,545 --> 01:11:57,925
We've got one hour
and 49 minutes to make it.
1262
01:11:58,717 --> 01:12:02,931
And by the way, one of you fucktards
is gonna need to do the eulogy.
1263
01:12:04,432 --> 01:12:06,560
- I'll do it.
- Mmh?
1264
01:12:07,603 --> 01:12:08,981
It's alright.
1265
01:12:10,565 --> 01:12:12,484
[woman on PA]
This is the final boarding call
1266
01:12:12,610 --> 01:12:15,321
for Qantas flight QF1
to London Heathrow.
1267
01:12:15,446 --> 01:12:17,908
Your flight is now boarding
at gate 15.
1268
01:12:18,033 --> 01:12:19,994
Would all passengers...
1269
01:12:21,997 --> 01:12:24,500
Are you sure it's a good idea
for you to do the eulogy, Graham?
1270
01:12:24,625 --> 01:12:26,460
You're the worst public speaker
in the world.
1271
01:12:26,585 --> 01:12:29,131
No I'm not! I'm really good
if I've got time to prepare.
1272
01:12:29,256 --> 01:12:31,425
- [David] Now, now.
- Hey, it's the Captain.
1273
01:12:31,550 --> 01:12:34,304
- You made it.
- That's him.
1274
01:12:34,429 --> 01:12:37,641
That's that cock-faced prick
that crashed my plane.
1275
01:12:42,314 --> 01:12:44,400
It's actually a pretty full flight,
1276
01:12:44,525 --> 01:12:47,696
so two of you will be upgraded
to business class.
1277
01:12:47,821 --> 01:12:50,198
What, does that mean
one of us has to fly economy?
1278
01:12:50,950 --> 01:12:52,035
I'm afraid so.
1279
01:12:52,160 --> 01:12:54,872
Oh, great! So how are we
going to sort that out?
1280
01:12:54,997 --> 01:12:57,416
Well it's not gonna be me,
that's for sure. I snogged Mungus.
1281
01:12:57,541 --> 01:13:00,962
- Well, I shagged Maureen.
- Yeah, but you loved it, Graham.
1282
01:13:01,634 --> 01:13:03,012
- No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did.
1283
01:13:03,097 --> 01:13:05,737
I didn't, it was disgusting.
- It was not disgusting, you loved it.
1284
01:13:05,761 --> 01:13:08,852
Alright. David, thumbs up,
thumbs down. Ready?
1285
01:13:08,977 --> 01:13:11,272
- One, two, three.
- No, I'm sitting in economy.
1286
01:13:13,107 --> 01:13:14,109
Why?
1287
01:13:14,234 --> 01:13:16,904
Because if sitting in a very
uncomfortable seat for 22 hours
1288
01:13:17,029 --> 01:13:19,470
means I get to be away from you two,
then that's good with me.
1289
01:13:19,574 --> 01:13:22,077
Come on, David. You weren't serious
about all that, were you?
1290
01:13:22,202 --> 01:13:24,079
For one thing,
you called my wife a bint.
1291
01:13:24,164 --> 01:13:26,285
- Yeah, but...
- Beyond that, I'm sick of the moaning,
1292
01:13:26,309 --> 01:13:28,543
the bickering, the squabbling,
the idiocy,
1293
01:13:28,668 --> 01:13:30,546
- the shitting in the pants.
- Huh?
1294
01:13:31,923 --> 01:13:33,508
I'm done with all of it!
1295
01:13:34,635 --> 01:13:36,053
Thank you.
1296
01:13:36,178 --> 01:13:38,014
David, look.
1297
01:13:38,139 --> 01:13:41,268
- We're all tired.
- This isn't working for me anymore.
1298
01:13:41,393 --> 01:13:43,228
And it hasn't been for a long time.
1299
01:13:45,231 --> 01:13:47,525
Are you splitting up with us?
1300
01:13:47,651 --> 01:13:49,654
If you want to put it that way, yeah.
1301
01:13:50,488 --> 01:13:51,739
That suits me.
1302
01:13:55,702 --> 01:13:57,747
- Guys, what...
- Leave it, Graham.
1303
01:13:57,872 --> 01:13:59,123
He's made up his mind.
1304
01:13:59,248 --> 01:14:01,794
- Have a nice flight.
- Thank you, darling.
1305
01:14:03,128 --> 01:14:04,297
Cheers.
1306
01:14:09,387 --> 01:14:14,643
♪ I remember all the things
you said to me ♪
1307
01:14:16,938 --> 01:14:19,441
♪ Never saw the truth ♪
1308
01:14:19,566 --> 01:14:22,277
♪ Through the tears I cried ♪
1309
01:14:22,987 --> 01:14:27,368
♪ I guess it's time to say goodbye ♪
1310
01:14:27,493 --> 01:14:29,787
♪ Goodbye ♪
1311
01:14:35,920 --> 01:14:38,465
- Have you seen David?
- He's probably here somewhere.
1312
01:14:40,217 --> 01:14:42,345
I'm starting to regret
saying I'd do the eulogy.
1313
01:14:42,470 --> 01:14:43,847
Yeah, of course you bloody are.
1314
01:14:43,972 --> 01:14:45,807
Do you even know
what you're gonna say?
1315
01:14:46,434 --> 01:14:48,394
I was just gonna say
what a great friend Luke was.
1316
01:14:48,477 --> 01:14:49,687
Yeah.
1317
01:14:49,812 --> 01:14:52,899
And how he had the biggest heart
of anyone I've ever known.
1318
01:14:53,025 --> 01:14:54,110
And the biggest cock.
1319
01:14:54,235 --> 01:14:55,987
Yeah, I don't think I'll mention that.
1320
01:14:56,112 --> 01:14:59,825
He did have a big cock though,
didn't he? Who knew?
1321
01:14:59,950 --> 01:15:01,452
What a bloody waste.
1322
01:15:01,578 --> 01:15:04,831
Can you stop talking about
our dead mate's cock, please?
1323
01:15:04,956 --> 01:15:06,751
Shit, I'm getting nervous now.
1324
01:15:06,876 --> 01:15:09,128
- What are you worried about? Henry?
- Yes!
1325
01:15:09,796 --> 01:15:11,965
And I also thought
if I do a good job with the eulogy,
1326
01:15:12,090 --> 01:15:13,468
maybe David won't be so angry.
1327
01:15:14,385 --> 01:15:16,545
I don't think that's gonna
make the difference, Graham.
1328
01:15:17,723 --> 01:15:19,641
What are we going to do then?
1329
01:15:19,767 --> 01:15:21,394
I don't know.
1330
01:15:22,270 --> 01:15:24,272
Fuck, this is going to be
a nightmare.
1331
01:15:27,485 --> 01:15:29,488
[Tom] Here you are.
Have a toke on this bake-off.
1332
01:15:30,113 --> 01:15:32,617
Are you serious? Don't you remember
what happened to me
1333
01:15:32,742 --> 01:15:34,619
last time I took drugs
before a speech?
1334
01:15:34,744 --> 01:15:37,585
That was totally different, Graham.
That was coke that got you too high.
1335
01:15:37,609 --> 01:15:39,778
This is weed,
it'll just calm you down.
1336
01:15:40,251 --> 01:15:43,338
- Really?
- Yeah! Yeah, go on. Get it down you.
1337
01:15:43,463 --> 01:15:44,757
We can't do it here.
1338
01:15:44,882 --> 01:15:47,719
Oh, come on, let's go
to that park over the road.
1339
01:15:47,844 --> 01:15:49,137
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
1340
01:15:53,101 --> 01:15:54,310
- Bake off.
- Bake off.
1341
01:15:54,435 --> 01:15:56,188
Come on.
1342
01:15:57,523 --> 01:15:59,609
[organ music]
1343
01:16:14,795 --> 01:16:16,255
I'm so sorry for your loss.
1344
01:16:16,380 --> 01:16:19,551
- Luke was a great guy.
- Thank you.
1345
01:16:19,676 --> 01:16:23,848
- Your name's Graham, isn't it?
- No, David.
1346
01:16:23,973 --> 01:16:26,977
Luke was always so fond of you,
1347
01:16:27,102 --> 01:16:29,020
- Graham.
- David!
1348
01:16:29,646 --> 01:16:32,733
This is Luke's friend Graham.
1349
01:16:32,859 --> 01:16:36,071
- [man] Hello, Graham.
- [David] It's David.
1350
01:16:36,196 --> 01:16:37,907
[man] Graham.
1351
01:16:40,243 --> 01:16:41,704
[gasps]
1352
01:17:03,105 --> 01:17:05,609
[slurring] Let's sit here.
1353
01:17:14,578 --> 01:17:16,497
[groaning]
1354
01:17:18,041 --> 01:17:20,377
[gasping]
1355
01:17:22,922 --> 01:17:26,259
- I'm utterly fucked.
- Me too.
1356
01:17:26,384 --> 01:17:29,263
That weed's really fucking powerful.
1357
01:17:29,388 --> 01:17:31,057
I think it must be laced with something.
1358
01:17:31,182 --> 01:17:33,143
It's seriously trippy, man.
1359
01:17:34,102 --> 01:17:36,689
Why didn't you tell me how strong
it was before we smoked it?
1360
01:17:36,814 --> 01:17:38,650
I forgot.
1361
01:17:40,152 --> 01:17:42,989
- Huh?
- Welcome, everyone.
1362
01:17:43,114 --> 01:17:45,492
We'll begin today's service
1363
01:17:45,617 --> 01:17:49,038
with a few words
from Luke's friend, Graham.
1364
01:17:49,163 --> 01:17:51,124
What?
1365
01:17:51,833 --> 01:17:53,335
[mumbles]
1366
01:17:53,460 --> 01:17:54,754
Fuck!
1367
01:18:04,724 --> 01:18:05,810
[Henry growls]
1368
01:18:05,935 --> 01:18:07,561
That's not Graham.
1369
01:18:07,687 --> 01:18:09,522
[sniggers]
1370
01:18:16,364 --> 01:18:18,617
Hi, everyone.
1371
01:18:18,742 --> 01:18:20,327
I'm Graham.
1372
01:18:21,371 --> 01:18:22,747
He's not.
1373
01:18:22,872 --> 01:18:24,249
What?
1374
01:18:26,669 --> 01:18:29,732
Luke and I were friends
for many years,
1375
01:18:29,774 --> 01:18:34,321
and during that time
he was always a true friend.
1376
01:18:36,199 --> 01:18:38,284
He really cared about people.
1377
01:18:39,585 --> 01:18:42,005
And of everyone I've ever known,
1378
01:18:42,130 --> 01:18:44,507
he definitely had the biggest cock.
1379
01:18:44,632 --> 01:18:46,677
- [gasping]
- What was that?
1380
01:18:48,471 --> 01:18:50,015
Heart.
1381
01:18:51,016 --> 01:18:53,144
I was meant to say biggest heart.
1382
01:18:55,521 --> 01:18:57,858
I mean, it's not like
I ever saw Luke's...
1383
01:18:58,525 --> 01:19:00,110
Well, not fully erect anyway.
1384
01:19:00,820 --> 01:19:02,697
Well, that's not strictly true, actually,
1385
01:19:02,822 --> 01:19:07,787
because when he died,
he had this massive hard-on.
1386
01:19:08,830 --> 01:19:10,624
[laughs]
1387
01:19:19,676 --> 01:19:22,180
It wasn't that massive.
1388
01:19:22,305 --> 01:19:24,600
It was more like...
1389
01:19:24,725 --> 01:19:26,519
It wasn't like a monster cock.
1390
01:19:26,644 --> 01:19:28,230
[laughs]
1391
01:19:28,355 --> 01:19:32,360
Sort of thing you see in pornos.
1392
01:19:33,402 --> 01:19:34,445
[flatulates]
1393
01:19:34,570 --> 01:19:35,864
What?
1394
01:19:35,989 --> 01:19:37,074
Monstercocks.com.
1395
01:19:37,199 --> 01:19:38,700
[laughing]
1396
01:19:43,874 --> 01:19:46,795
I don't know why I'm laughing.
1397
01:19:46,920 --> 01:19:48,255
I'm really sad.
1398
01:19:49,965 --> 01:19:51,676
[talking muffled with laughter]
1399
01:19:52,635 --> 01:19:54,303
Hello, hello, everyone.
1400
01:19:55,681 --> 01:20:00,436
I apologize for my friend Graham here.
I just...
1401
01:20:00,562 --> 01:20:01,938
[Graham laughing]
1402
01:20:04,733 --> 01:20:07,279
Oh, effing bake.
1403
01:20:08,363 --> 01:20:10,950
- What?
- Huh? Huh?
1404
01:20:14,079 --> 01:20:15,914
[clears throat]
1405
01:20:18,001 --> 01:20:20,587
What he was trying to say
1406
01:20:20,712 --> 01:20:24,008
is that Luke was
a great friend to all of us,
1407
01:20:24,133 --> 01:20:25,677
and we're gonna miss him.
1408
01:20:27,637 --> 01:20:31,058
You know, he was kind of
like the glue that kept us together.
1409
01:20:33,979 --> 01:20:36,440
And I guess since he's gone,
1410
01:20:36,565 --> 01:20:38,693
things have kind of fallen apart a bit.
1411
01:20:38,818 --> 01:20:41,071
[crying]
1412
01:20:41,197 --> 01:20:44,576
I mean we may have had
our ups and downs,
1413
01:20:44,701 --> 01:20:48,121
and none of us are perfect,
far from it,
1414
01:20:50,583 --> 01:20:52,252
but we went through a lot together.
1415
01:20:54,880 --> 01:20:58,259
And I wouldn't change
our little group
1416
01:20:58,384 --> 01:21:00,262
for anything in the world.
1417
01:21:02,389 --> 01:21:03,557
Um...
1418
01:21:08,606 --> 01:21:09,982
Um...
1419
01:21:12,236 --> 01:21:13,612
That's Graham.
1420
01:21:14,613 --> 01:21:15,865
Sorry, mate.
1421
01:21:17,659 --> 01:21:19,745
[Graham] I'm sorry, too.
1422
01:21:24,584 --> 01:21:26,544
[laughs]
1423
01:21:26,671 --> 01:21:29,173
- Oh, shut up, Graham.
- [Graham] I'm sorry.
1424
01:21:38,644 --> 01:21:40,187
Uh...
1425
01:21:43,358 --> 01:21:47,947
I'd just like to add that...
we'll never forget Luke.
1426
01:21:50,075 --> 01:21:54,372
Like Tom said, none of us
are without our foibles,
1427
01:21:55,623 --> 01:21:59,878
but true friends accept each other,
even with their flaws,
1428
01:22:01,256 --> 01:22:03,133
and Luke...
1429
01:22:04,759 --> 01:22:05,970
was a true friend.
1430
01:22:06,929 --> 01:22:08,347
With a large penis.
1431
01:22:08,472 --> 01:22:09,808
[gasping]
1432
01:22:09,933 --> 01:22:11,977
[growls]
1433
01:22:12,102 --> 01:22:13,771
Right!
1434
01:22:15,690 --> 01:22:16,984
That's it.
1435
01:22:17,109 --> 01:22:18,485
Stop, oi.
1436
01:22:18,610 --> 01:22:20,530
[growls]
1437
01:22:20,655 --> 01:22:23,867
I'm not going to fuck you, David.
I'm going to fuck all of you.
1438
01:22:23,992 --> 01:22:26,078
You can't run away from me.
1439
01:22:26,996 --> 01:22:29,624
Stop! Stop, you lot.
1440
01:22:30,500 --> 01:22:32,337
Time for a bollicking.
1441
01:22:33,212 --> 01:22:35,006
Oh, you're a slippery fucker.
1442
01:22:35,131 --> 01:22:38,635
When I get hold of you, you'll wish
you never had an asshole, David.
1443
01:22:38,761 --> 01:22:40,597
Graham, stop!
1444
01:22:41,473 --> 01:22:42,891
Where the fuck did they go?
1445
01:22:44,643 --> 01:22:46,020
Fuck.
1446
01:22:46,145 --> 01:22:47,939
Shh.
1447
01:22:51,361 --> 01:22:53,196
Do you think they've gone?
1448
01:22:53,321 --> 01:22:55,082
We should give it a bit longer,
just in case.
1449
01:22:55,115 --> 01:22:56,533
Yeah.
1450
01:22:57,409 --> 01:22:59,662
[sniffs]
1451
01:22:59,788 --> 01:23:02,123
Have you shat yourself again,
Graham?
1452
01:23:02,248 --> 01:23:04,627
No, just farted.
1453
01:23:05,586 --> 01:23:07,881
Oh, for fuck's sake.
1454
01:23:08,965 --> 01:23:11,094
Oh, that's really bad.
1455
01:23:11,219 --> 01:23:13,179
- [gagging]
- Shh!
1456
01:23:16,183 --> 01:23:17,810
[sniffing]
1457
01:23:19,979 --> 01:23:22,149
Smelling your own fart
is always nice, isn't it?
1458
01:23:22,274 --> 01:23:24,777
- No.
- No.
1459
01:23:26,947 --> 01:23:28,907
- [Henry] Hello.
- [screaming]
1460
01:23:29,032 --> 01:23:30,118
[dramatic music]
1461
01:27:49,569 --> 01:27:51,947
[clapper] 40 boobs, take one.
1462
01:27:52,072 --> 01:27:53,282
Nice board.
1463
01:27:54,617 --> 01:27:56,161
Fucking cunt. Fuck!
1464
01:27:59,415 --> 01:28:00,958
Fucking cunt. Fuck!
1465
01:28:01,667 --> 01:28:03,086
Fuck!
1466
01:28:03,211 --> 01:28:04,963
[flies buzzing]
1467
01:28:10,554 --> 01:28:13,182
[Mungus] Yes, who's there?
1468
01:28:13,307 --> 01:28:15,393
[laughs]
1469
01:28:18,189 --> 01:28:20,065
[chattering]
1470
01:28:20,900 --> 01:28:22,621
- Wombats are the worst.
- [Graham] Wombats?
1471
01:28:22,736 --> 01:28:24,237
Well, they've got
a two-pronged penis.
1472
01:28:24,362 --> 01:28:26,073
A two-pronged penis?
1473
01:28:26,199 --> 01:28:28,534
The females have got two vaginas.
1474
01:28:29,495 --> 01:28:31,997
- [Tom] Yeah?
- Yeah.
1475
01:28:32,122 --> 01:28:34,803
[Graham] Don't you remember what
happened the last time I took drugs
1476
01:28:34,827 --> 01:28:36,708
- before a speech?
- That was totally different.
1477
01:28:36,796 --> 01:28:37,922
Are you serious?
1478
01:28:38,047 --> 01:28:40,287
Don't you remember what happened
last time... [babbling].
1479
01:28:40,311 --> 01:28:42,356
[babbling]
1480
01:28:44,889 --> 01:28:46,098
He's our friend.
1481
01:28:46,224 --> 01:28:48,477
- Shut up.
- Can you just let me...
1482
01:28:48,602 --> 01:28:50,521
[laughs]
1483
01:28:50,646 --> 01:28:52,206
It's not shagging around though, is it?
1484
01:28:52,332 --> 01:28:54,372
It's shagging one person
for a very specific reason.
1485
01:28:54,418 --> 01:28:57,446
And there just happens to be
very mit... mitigating... [babbling].
1486
01:28:57,571 --> 01:28:58,572
Do it again.
1487
01:28:59,198 --> 01:29:02,035
Airbus, British wings, British made.
1488
01:29:03,370 --> 01:29:05,164
What's happening?
1489
01:29:05,832 --> 01:29:07,166
- Hang on.
- Different scene.
1490
01:29:07,291 --> 01:29:09,545
- It's a different scene.
- I thought so, just checking.
1491
01:29:09,670 --> 01:29:12,715
The point is, you know,
this would make me really happy
1492
01:29:12,841 --> 01:29:15,636
if we could fuck up my lines
any more than I have, fuck!
1493
01:29:17,847 --> 01:29:19,891
[laughing]
1494
01:29:23,813 --> 01:29:27,109
Do you think, Mark, do you think
Lynette should slap me in the face?
1495
01:29:27,234 --> 01:29:28,694
- [Mark] Great.
- Quite hard?
1496
01:29:28,819 --> 01:29:31,281
- [Mark] Yes, definitely.
- [Maureen] Do you like it?
1497
01:29:31,406 --> 01:29:34,952
I think we should just... go, slap me,
but just give me a bit more, er...
1498
01:29:35,077 --> 01:29:37,037
[Maureen] Why would I do that?
I've never...
1499
01:29:37,162 --> 01:29:39,374
- That's SandM.
- [Mark] Go for it.
1500
01:29:39,499 --> 01:29:40,959
[Maureen] Well, I don't even...
1501
01:29:41,084 --> 01:29:43,337
Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo.
1502
01:29:43,462 --> 01:29:45,757
You're not a child, Tom,
so you just...
1503
01:29:47,092 --> 01:29:49,094
You're not a child, Tom.
1504
01:29:49,846 --> 01:29:50,888
[laughs]
1505
01:29:52,056 --> 01:29:53,767
Shit.
1506
01:29:53,892 --> 01:29:55,603
- Sorry, it's my fault.
- Run.
1507
01:29:55,728 --> 01:29:58,398
Now, that's Kev.
That goes down as Kevin, not me, OK?
1508
01:29:58,523 --> 01:30:00,567
It's not me.
1509
01:30:00,692 --> 01:30:02,153
That's not me. That's not me.
1510
01:30:02,278 --> 01:30:04,280
Seventy-six Anus.
1511
01:30:04,405 --> 01:30:06,867
A camera mark.
Take one.
1512
01:30:07,576 --> 01:30:10,580
I don't think you heard me
properly, David.
1513
01:30:12,373 --> 01:30:14,627
Sorry, I fucked that line up.
1514
01:30:14,752 --> 01:30:17,130
So, I don't suppose
we could make a call,
1515
01:30:17,255 --> 01:30:20,551
- sort out some transport?
- [Mungus] Yeah, course you can.
1516
01:30:20,676 --> 01:30:22,303
Come on inside.
1517
01:30:39,867 --> 01:30:41,619
[chuckles]
1518
01:30:42,703 --> 01:30:44,831
[laughing]
1519
01:30:50,838 --> 01:30:52,841
That's two massive idiot things.
1520
01:30:52,966 --> 01:30:55,887
- Everything always goes wrong.
- Thanks. No. [laughs]
1521
01:30:57,138 --> 01:31:00,267
I've no idea what the fuck I'm saying,
but we can A.D.R. it later.
1522
01:31:00,393 --> 01:31:01,686
Yeah.
1523
01:31:01,811 --> 01:31:03,980
You guys should come... Sorry.
1524
01:31:04,106 --> 01:31:05,524
[laughing]
1525
01:31:05,649 --> 01:31:07,402
I just saw your hand go back.
1526
01:31:07,527 --> 01:31:11,573
Oh, nice. It's just there's a...
you know, like... [babbling]
1527
01:31:14,160 --> 01:31:15,662
Moochculus!
1528
01:31:16,204 --> 01:31:18,040
Have you ever met John Travolta?
1529
01:31:18,165 --> 01:31:20,042
[laughs]
1530
01:31:20,918 --> 01:31:23,672
- Do you think they've gone?
- We should give it a bit longer,
1531
01:31:23,797 --> 01:31:25,883
- just in case.
- [flatulates]
1532
01:31:26,008 --> 01:31:27,593
[sniffs]
1533
01:31:28,511 --> 01:31:30,472
[laughing]